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Speaking Of Snakes...

Snaggletiger

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Re: Speaking Of Snakes...
« Reply #20 on: April 11, 2012, 04:51:53 PM »
I grew up on the Alabama river. The first thing always loaded into the boat was the gun. I've seen some big ass water moccasins. They love to sun themselves on the bank.
Thought it would be funny one day to hit one with my lure. Not funny. He chased it back to the boat and tried to get in. Harder to hit with a .22 pistol when they are moving.

Was bream fishing on Lake Eufaula one time and pulled up to a fallen tree to fish around it.  Got about 10 yards from it when we spotted one curled up in the tree.  He didn't hesitate and took a direct line towards the boat.  I took my pole and kept trying to hit him until finally I popped him good and he took off.  But damn, what an aggressive mofo.   
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

CCTAU

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Re: Speaking Of Snakes...
« Reply #21 on: April 11, 2012, 04:59:17 PM »
Was bream fishing on Lake Eufaula one time and pulled up to a fallen tree to fish around it.  Got about 10 yards from it when we spotted one curled up in the tree.  He didn't hesitate and took a direct line towards the boat.  I took my pole and kept trying to hit him until finally I popped him good and he took off.  But damn, what an aggressive mofo.

The bad part is, if he gets in the boat, where you gonna go? I've seen many a paddle beat to splinters. My dad just looks at me and says, "Now you know why we load the gun first."


CHOOT'EM. CHOOT'EM.
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Five statements of WISDOM
1. You cannot legislate the poor into prosperity, by legislating the wealth out of prosperity.
2. What one person receives without working for, another person must work for without receiving.
3. The government cannot give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody else.
4. You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it.
5. When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to work because the other half is going to take care of them, and when the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work because somebody else is going to get what they work for, that my dear friends, is the beginning of the end of any nation.

AWK

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Re: Speaking Of Snakes...
« Reply #22 on: April 11, 2012, 05:23:32 PM »
Anti-venom for a coral snake costs around $50,000.  $1 million seems a bit ridiculous.  Has to be a billing mistake.
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Redskins cornerback DeAngelo Hall said, "Guys don't mind hitting Michael Vick in the open field, but when you see Cam, you have to think about how you're going to tackle him. He's like a big tight end coming at you."

Re: Speaking Of Snakes...
« Reply #23 on: April 11, 2012, 05:45:07 PM »
Anti-venom for a coral snake costs around $50,000. 


Why?
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The Guy That Knows Nothing of Hyperbole

CCTAU

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Re: Speaking Of Snakes...
« Reply #24 on: April 11, 2012, 05:46:02 PM »
Why?

In case you get bit right outside the door of the hospital that has it.
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Five statements of WISDOM
1. You cannot legislate the poor into prosperity, by legislating the wealth out of prosperity.
2. What one person receives without working for, another person must work for without receiving.
3. The government cannot give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody else.
4. You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it.
5. When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to work because the other half is going to take care of them, and when the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work because somebody else is going to get what they work for, that my dear friends, is the beginning of the end of any nation.

AWK

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Re: Speaking Of Snakes...
« Reply #25 on: April 11, 2012, 06:14:03 PM »
Why?
Because they stopped producing it 2 years ago.  So it is hard to find now.  Don't ask me how I know this.
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Redskins cornerback DeAngelo Hall said, "Guys don't mind hitting Michael Vick in the open field, but when you see Cam, you have to think about how you're going to tackle him. He's like a big tight end coming at you."

djsimp

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Re: Speaking Of Snakes...
« Reply #26 on: April 11, 2012, 08:23:05 PM »
Don't ask me how I know this.

Ok, how do you know this?
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Godfather

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Re: Speaking Of Snakes...
« Reply #27 on: April 11, 2012, 11:40:42 PM »
Ok, how do you know this?
Because as a way to pay for law school, AWK sucks out the venom of the victims.
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djsimp

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Re: Speaking Of Snakes...
« Reply #28 on: April 11, 2012, 11:45:25 PM »
Because as a way to pay for law school, AWK sucks out the venom of the victims.

Ima thinking there is wayyyyy more to it than just this. We may get to the bottom of things with this little clue right here.
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Re: Speaking Of Snakes...
« Reply #29 on: April 12, 2012, 09:06:00 AM »
I got a cool snake story bro.   

I was fishing in a river from the bank and I had my fish on a fish stringer.   When it was time to go I picked up the stringer to discover a moccasin had swallowed a fish on my stringer and was stuck on the end of my stringer.  I don't know who was more surprised the snake or me.    The snake was trying like crazy to get off the stringer, but he was stuck.   I threw the entire thing,  stringer, fish on the stringer, and snake into the river and got the heck out of there.

 
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GH2001

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Re: Speaking Of Snakes...
« Reply #30 on: April 12, 2012, 09:11:19 AM »
Copperheads and Rattlesnakes (some) would just as soon be left alone.   (Too soon?)

The hell you say. About like a Red Wasp shies away from trouble.
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WDE

Re: Speaking Of Snakes...
« Reply #31 on: April 12, 2012, 11:07:10 AM »
The hell you say. About like a Red Wasp shies away from trouble.

My dad and I would be fishing in Mill Creek off of the Alabama River in Camden surrounded by gators and snakes but the first time the boat bumped one of the thousands of stumps that would have a wasp or a hornet nest on it you can bet we went for a swim.  Just picture red wasps crawling around on a nest the size of a dinner plate.  (shiver)
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You meet a man on the Oregon Trail. He tells you his name is Terry. You laugh and tell him: "That's a girl's name!" Terry shoots you. You have died of dissin' Terry.

GH2001

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Re: Speaking Of Snakes...
« Reply #32 on: April 12, 2012, 11:10:20 AM »
My dad and I would be fishing in Mill Creek off of the Alabama River in Camden surrounded by gators and snakes but the first time the boat bumped one of the thousands of stumps that would have a wasp or a hornet nest on it you can bet we went for a swim.  Just picture red wasps crawling around on a nest the size of a dinner plate.  (shiver)

Red Wasps have to be the most aggressive, pissed off creatures in the entire animal world.

And to actually get stung by one or more is even worse. Feels like a fucking hot poker for a good length of time. Have gotten stung by some the last 2 summers and you don't even see it coming - they just see you and get you.
« Last Edit: April 12, 2012, 11:11:30 AM by GH2001 »
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WDE

Snaggletiger

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Re: Speaking Of Snakes...
« Reply #33 on: April 12, 2012, 11:13:57 AM »
My dad and I would be fishing in Mill Creek off of the Alabama River in Camden surrounded by gators and snakes but the first time the boat bumped one of the thousands of stumps that would have a wasp or a hornet nest on it you can bet we went for a swim.  Just picture red wasps crawling around on a nest the size of a dinner plate.  (shiver)

THIS X 100000000000000000000...infinity. Wasps are my big heebie-jeebie.  Was fishing last year in a remote part of a river in Georgia.  (Cue banjo music) Came to this area with a bunch of dead trees sticking out of the water.  When we got close, saw that they were all covered in those dinner plate sized nests with about 500 red wasps on steroids on each one.  I started freaking out and my buddy was like, "Oh, they ain't gonna' do nuthin'...

NO....YOU ASSHOLE...BACK THIS BOAT UP NOW!!!!
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

Re: Speaking Of Snakes...
« Reply #34 on: April 12, 2012, 11:16:45 AM »
THIS X 100000000000000000000...infinity. Wasps are my big heebie-jeebie.  Was fishing last year in a remote part of a river in Georgia.  (Cue banjo music) Came to this area with a bunch of dead trees sticking out of the water.  When we got close, saw that they were all covered in those dinner plate sized nests with about 500 red wasps on steroids on each one.  I started freaking out and my buddy was like, "Oh, they ain't gonna' do nuthin'...

NO....YOU a-hole...BACK THIS BOAT UP NOW!!!!

My dad would tell me, "If you hear me jump in, you jump in too.  We'll figure out how to get back in the boat later."
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You meet a man on the Oregon Trail. He tells you his name is Terry. You laugh and tell him: "That's a girl's name!" Terry shoots you. You have died of dissin' Terry.

Godfather

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Re: Speaking Of Snakes...
« Reply #35 on: April 12, 2012, 11:26:46 AM »
Red Wasps have to be the most aggressive, pissed off creatures in the entire animal world.

And to actually get stung by one or more is even worse. Feels like a fucking hot poker for a good length of time. Have gotten stung by some the last 2 summers and you don't even see it coming - they just see you and get you.

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GH2001

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Re: Speaking Of Snakes...
« Reply #36 on: April 12, 2012, 01:18:24 PM »


Was gonna say at the least they are tied with Badgers and Wolverines.
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WDE

AUTiger1

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Re: Speaking Of Snakes...
« Reply #37 on: April 12, 2012, 02:10:52 PM »
  This thread, every bit of it. 
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Courage is only fear holding on a minute longer.--George S. Patton

There are gonna be days when you lay your guts on the line and you come away empty handed, there ain't a damn thing you can do about it but go back out there and lay em on the line again...and again, and again! -- Coach Pat Dye

It isn't that liberals are ignorant. It's just they know so much that isn't so. --Ronald Reagan

JR4AU

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Re: Speaking Of Snakes...
« Reply #38 on: April 12, 2012, 02:27:11 PM »
Red Wasps have to be the most aggressive, pissed off creatures in the entire animal world.

And to actually get stung by one or more is even worse. Feels like a fucking hot poker for a good length of time. Have gotten stung by some the last 2 summers and you don't even see it coming - they just see you and get you.

Many years ago, I was cutting grass on a hot day.  Sat on the back steps to take a swig of cold beer.  A red wasp was hovering right about eye level and within arms reach.  I swatted at it with my hat, and missed.  The next few seconds were like in slow motion.  I saw everything develop before my eyes, yet was powerless to stop it.  He had avoided my swat, then repositioned where he'd been hovering.  I actually could discern his intent from those black bug eyes, and I swear I heard him say, "Oh yeah fuck stick, well how do you like this shit?"  Then I saw the back half lower...and it's like he suddenly put it in reverse, and he hit me just above the knee!  Yeah, they hurt, but I've had one sting worse, and don't even know what it was.  Helping a buddy put up a tree stand near Waverly.  I felt a critter crawling on my forearm, on the outside portion where I couldn't see it.  As I started to instinctively swat at it, whatever it was stung me.  I continued the swat, and got it off, but the sting was done, and it felt like someone drove a nail in to the bone of my forearm.  It ached for 3 days. 

Snake story:  Fishing on Lake Eufala, snakes in trees everywhere.  Saw them all day.  Bud gets his lure stuck in a tree overhanging the bank.  He carefully inspects as he glides us in with the trolling motor.  No snake in that tree, but as he's getting his lure, the wind swings the back of the boat towards the bushes and my fucking asshole bud doesn't give a shit, and I start looking in the bushes, and I say "snake", but OH HELL NO, he's got to get that lure by God, and right now.  I got up, yelled "snaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaake" picked up a paddle, and got to the other side of the small bass boat, as far away as possible, and the big fucker fell from it's branch, half in the boat, half out.  Thank God, the half out was the head, and it slithered in to the water as I stood there with paddle in the air cussing and screaming.
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AUTiger1

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Re: Speaking Of Snakes...
« Reply #39 on: April 12, 2012, 02:42:54 PM »
We had put up a new hot fence on my dad's farm.  Someone (probably me) left an empty wire spool laying on the ground by the hot wire.  Reached down to pick it up so I could throw it away.  Apparently the red wasp that was making a home of the hole in the middle of the spool didn't like my finger there and stung the shit out of it.  I slung the spool, and dance around to get away and managed to get my ankles up against the hot fence and it burned the shit out me.   Fuck that day. 
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Courage is only fear holding on a minute longer.--George S. Patton

There are gonna be days when you lay your guts on the line and you come away empty handed, there ain't a damn thing you can do about it but go back out there and lay em on the line again...and again, and again! -- Coach Pat Dye

It isn't that liberals are ignorant. It's just they know so much that isn't so. --Ronald Reagan