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A Little Immigration Humor

AUTailgatingRules

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A Little Immigration Humor
« on: February 11, 2008, 02:09:47 PM »
A Somalian arrives in Minneapolis as a new immigrant to the United
States.
       He stops the first person he sees walking down the street and says,  "Thank
you Mr. American for letting me in this country , giving me housing,
food stamps, free medical care, and free education!" The passerby says, "You
are mistaken, I am Mexican."
       The man goes on and encounters another passerby. " Thank you for having
such a beautiful country here in America !" The person says, "I not American,
I Vietnamese.
"The new arrival walks further, and the next person he sees he stops,
shakes his hand and says, "Thank you for the wonderful America !" That person
puts up his hand and says, "I am from Middle East , I am not American!"
He finally sees a nice lady and asks, "Are you an American?" She says ,
"No, I am from Africa !" Puzzled, he asks her, "Where are all the
Americans?"The African lady checks her watch and says..."Probably at
work!!!!!!!
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GarMan

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Re: A Little Immigration Humor
« Reply #1 on: February 11, 2008, 04:05:39 PM »
A Somalian arrives in Minneapolis ...
...Puzzled, he asks her, "Where are all the
Americans?"The African lady checks her watch and says..."Probably at
work!!!!!!!

Tell me that's not the truth.  I am quickly arriving at the conclusion that the heart and soul of this country has been lost.  The Democrats are busy hyphenating their constituents and identifying the next group of victims...  And, here comes Hillary and Obama with promises of taxing the shit out of our country’s greatest producers and achievers only to award the incompetence and irresponsibility of our lowest common denominators with more social programs and larger government. 

The Democrats…  Penalizing success and rewarding mediocrity. 
 
They make me sick!
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My rule of life prescribed as an absolutely sacred rite smoking cigars and also the drinking of alcohol before, after and if need be during all meals and in the intervals between them.  - Winston Churchill

Eating and sleeping are the only activities that should be allowed to interrupt a man's enjoyment of his cigar.  - Mark Twain

Nothing says "Obey Me" like a bloody head on a fence post!  - Stewie Griffin

"Every government interference in the economy consists of giving an unearned benefit, extorted by force, to some men at the expense of others."  - Ayn Rand

AUTailgatingRules

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Re: A Little Immigration Humor
« Reply #2 on: February 11, 2008, 05:09:56 PM »
It was actually just a joke, but sadly it is so true that one might think it actually happened.
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GarMan

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Re: A Little Immigration Humor
« Reply #3 on: February 11, 2008, 06:00:58 PM »
It was actually just a joke, but sadly it is so true that one might think it actually happened.

Yes, I know, but actual situations like this happen all of the time.  I was working in Indianapolis a few weeks ago and ran into a cab driver who recently came over from Kenya.  For the entire ride, he kept ranting about how much he loved this country and how easy it was to work hard and make lots of money.  At the end of my $5 ride, I gave him a couple of extra dollars.  You would have thought I slipped him a $100. 

Meanwhile, not 15 feet away from where he dropped me off was a street bum, hyphenated-American rattling a cup full of change looking for a handout.  I sincerely hope that he enjoyed his blistering cold night on the street.  Perhaps, Michael Moore will cruise by to help him with his voter registration application.  Then, they can bus all of these clowns to the polls like they did during the last election. 
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My rule of life prescribed as an absolutely sacred rite smoking cigars and also the drinking of alcohol before, after and if need be during all meals and in the intervals between them.  - Winston Churchill

Eating and sleeping are the only activities that should be allowed to interrupt a man's enjoyment of his cigar.  - Mark Twain

Nothing says "Obey Me" like a bloody head on a fence post!  - Stewie Griffin

"Every government interference in the economy consists of giving an unearned benefit, extorted by force, to some men at the expense of others."  - Ayn Rand

Jumbo

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Re: A Little Immigration Humor
« Reply #4 on: February 12, 2008, 02:26:38 AM »
Tell me that's not the truth.  I am quickly arriving at the conclusion that the heart and soul of this country has been lost.  The Democrats are busy hyphenating their constituents and identifying the next group of victims...  And, here comes Hillary and Obama with promises of taxing the shit out of our country’s greatest producers and achievers only to award the incompetence and irresponsibility of our lowest common denominators with more social programs and larger government. 

The Democrats…  Penalizing success and rewarding mediocrity. 
 
They make me sick!

Quote
Penalizing success and rewarding mediocrity
What's wrong with that?
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You'll never shine if you don't glow.

Ogre

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Re: A Little Immigration Humor
« Reply #5 on: February 12, 2008, 09:34:53 AM »
Yes, I know, but actual situations like this happen all of the time.  I was working in Indianapolis a few weeks ago and ran into a cab driver who recently came over from Kenya.  For the entire ride, he kept ranting about how much he loved this country and how easy it was to work hard and make lots of money.  At the end of my $5 ride, I gave him a couple of extra dollars.  You would have thought I slipped him a $100. 

Meanwhile, not 15 feet away from where he dropped me off was a street bum, hyphenated-American rattling a cup full of change looking for a handout.  I sincerely hope that he enjoyed his blistering cold night on the street.  Perhaps, Michael Moore will cruise by to help him with his voter registration application.  Then, they can bus all of these clowns to the polls like they did during the last election. 

I know what you mean.  I was in San Francisco last week, and down at the Fisherman's Wharf there was this a homeless man that was sitting on a bucket, holding a large bush in front of him to hide himself from pedestrians.  By the time we came up on him he had attracted quite a crowd.  As people would walk by he would shake the bush and growl at them.  People would absolutely freak out.  It was the funniest thing I'd seen in a while!  He had an empty paint bucket and most times the people he scared would gladly throw some money in. 

Then you walk up the street and about every 30 feet there would be some run-of-the-mill panhandler who would just jingle a cup of change in front of your face.  I wouldn't even give them a second glance.  If you want some of my hard-earned money, at least try to entertain me.  I don't do handouts.
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GarMan

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Re: A Little Immigration Humor
« Reply #6 on: February 12, 2008, 11:03:45 AM »
What's wrong with that?

Oh nothing...  Nothing at all...  As long as you favor socialism over capitalism and the joys that come along with it such as double digit unemployment, sub-2% GDP and an overall declining society, just as the global elites enjoy over in Europe. 
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My rule of life prescribed as an absolutely sacred rite smoking cigars and also the drinking of alcohol before, after and if need be during all meals and in the intervals between them.  - Winston Churchill

Eating and sleeping are the only activities that should be allowed to interrupt a man's enjoyment of his cigar.  - Mark Twain

Nothing says "Obey Me" like a bloody head on a fence post!  - Stewie Griffin

"Every government interference in the economy consists of giving an unearned benefit, extorted by force, to some men at the expense of others."  - Ayn Rand