Tigers X - Number one Source to Talk Auburn Tigers Sports

Pre-Dick-Shuns Week Butt Sechs

Snaggletiger

  • *
  • 44514
  • My Fighting Pearls
Pre-Dick-Shuns Week Butt Sechs
« on: October 03, 2023, 03:17:57 PM »
Love the off week.  No pressure, worrying about how the War Eagles will perform, and nothing to plan around, game-wise.  The only stress will be deciding what species of recently slaughtered member of the animal kingdom will be placed over some hot coals. Some decent games around the country, but the SEC is where it’s at for some neato-keen match ups.  The big one nationally will be:

Oklahoma @ Texas:  The Red River Shootout will feature #12 vs. #3.  Both teams come in at 5-0, but let’s face it, the combined schedules qualify as warmed over dog shit.  Outside of the Steers and Queers taking down Bama, the best team on either team’s schedule so far, may be Iowa State. Baylor? And while beating the Tahd any time at the Crapstoned is a pretty big deal, let’s face it, Bama just wasn’t a very good team several weeks ago.  I watched the first half of Okie’s win over the Cyclones Saturday night, and they looked unstoppable offensively, and pretty skippy on D.  But they’ve been up and down all season on offense.  Texas is certainly no juggernaut on the offensive side of the ball, with 40 being their biggest number on the scoreboard so far.   I’m going with QB, Dillon Gabriel, and the Boomers in this one.

Oklahoma:  35

Texas:  28


Arkansas @ Ole Miss:  The display that the Black Bears and Bengal Kitties put on Saturday night, was exactly what I always expect from this game.  These two never seem to disappoint when it comes to shootouts at the O.K. Corral.  57-49 is usually the norm, rather than the exception.  Arkansas has fallen on tough times right out of the gate, limping in at 1-3. However, they’ve been in every one of those losses. I was flabbergasted and amazed at the way Hobby Lobby continued to roll up and down the field over Brian Kelly’s felines.  I can see it happening again this Saturday.  Actually, by both teams, to an extent.  However, the reality is, this game is in Oxford, and Arkansas has the last rated overall offense in the league.  I see a lot of scoring, but mostly by the Landsharks.

Ole Miss:  49

Arkansas:  30


Kentucky @ FUGA:  I was watching the Cats game against Gusty Gator off and on before heading to the stadium Saturday.  It looked like they punished the Fighting Percy Harvey in every phase of the game, from what I saw.  However, while undefeated, the Mildcats have been less than dominating in their other 3 games.  Fuck Georgia has been riding the skruggle bus the last few weeks, and despite remaining #1, have a lot of people questioning whether that ranking is deserved.  Getting Ladd McConkey, who enrolled at FUGA in 1997, back on the field, is huge.  The FUGA D, while certainly not on the level of the past few years, is still pretty damn good, leading the SEC in ppg given up at just over 13.  My take is that Kentucky shot that wad facing Florida, who has become the team UK measures their season against. I see Fuck Georgia handling the Cats at the Cesspool of the South.

FUGA:  37

Kentucky:  21


Alabama @ Texas A&M:  This one could be a goodun’.  Bama is 2nd in total defense, giving up only 14.2 ppg and 297 total ypg.  Coach Greasy Car Salesman’s Aggies ain’t no slouch either, allowing 18.6 ppg, but lead the conference in least total yards allowed, at 254 a game. The game being at Bonfire Safety U, will help the Faggies.  But, it looks to me that since Lord Saybinz decided that Meal Row was his man, things have changed for the Packyderms.  I can’t see A&M putting up any real numbers against the Tahd, and it appears the Bama offense is getting on track.

Bama:  31

Texas A&M:  17

Feel free to opine, call a friend, or just generally talk amongst yourselves.     
« Last Edit: October 03, 2023, 03:42:16 PM by Snaggletiger »
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

Buzz Killington

  • *
  • 22895
  • Bofa
Re: Pre-Dick-Shuns Week Butt Sechs
« Reply #1 on: October 03, 2023, 03:33:05 PM »
OK Boomers     38
Weirdos            35

Goal Post Swan Divers  51
Pittstains                     48

Big Blue Balls    20
19 and his pals   34

Collie Molesters     24
Sister Molesters     21
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

wesfau2

  • ***
  • 13840
  • I love it when you call me Big Poppa
Re: Pre-Dick-Shuns Week Butt Sechs
« Reply #2 on: October 03, 2023, 03:37:09 PM »
I actually agree with all of these Snags's takes.  Thanks for saving me the typing effort.

The one I'd like to talk about is a lesser-marquee match-up: Vandy at UF.

The spread is about -19 for the Gusty Gatahs.  That seems like a lot, but UF has been a completely different team at home.  I think UK is semi-legit (though they won't beat UGA) and beating them at home is tough with Stoops at the helm.  I don't think UF is nearly as bad as they have looked in Utah and Kentucky.  Something about that swamp keeps them in working like a cohesive unit.  Vandy is, until further notice, Vandy.  The Fighting Percies cover.

Edit Note: Buzz sucks cock by choice behind Wu's stall.
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
You can keep a wooden stake in your trunk
On the off-chance that the fairy tales ain't bunk
And Imma keep a bottle of that funk
To get motel parking lot, balcony crunk.

War Damn Six

  • ****
  • 651
  • Pale Rider
Re: Pre-Dick-Shuns Week Butt Sechs
« Reply #3 on: October 03, 2023, 05:00:47 PM »
I don’t give a shit about any of these games since Auburn isn’t playing and one of the people I find less slimy and distasteful than Nick Saban is Jimbo Fisher.  I do think I want A&M to win so that his job is then secure for a couple more years and he has to watch as he drives the Aggies into the ground as he rakes in millions rather than sitting on his ass doing the same.  I have nothing against TAMU (I actually like the school) but I loathe Jimbo.  He is not a good coach but he has ridden the coattails of several above average athletes.  Even though one of them was a crab thief.  I don’t like him either.
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
“If you're waitin' for a woman to make up her mind, you may have a long wait.” Preacher

War Damn Six

  • ****
  • 651
  • Pale Rider
Re: Pre-Dick-Shuns Week Butt Sechs
« Reply #4 on: October 03, 2023, 05:03:17 PM »
OK Boomers     38
Weirdos            35

Goal Post Swan Divers  51
Pittstains                     48

Big Blue Balls    20
19 and his pals   34

Collie Molesters     24
Sister Molesters     21

Check your messages, dickweed. Or message me on Facebook so I can get in on that group text.
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
“If you're waitin' for a woman to make up her mind, you may have a long wait.” Preacher

wesfau2

  • ***
  • 13840
  • I love it when you call me Big Poppa
Re: Pre-Dick-Shuns Week Butt Sechs
« Reply #5 on: October 03, 2023, 05:17:27 PM »
I don’t give a shit about any of these games since Auburn isn’t playing and one of the people I find less slimy and distasteful than Nick Saban is Jimbo Fisher.  I do think I want A&M to win so that his job is then secure for a couple more years and he has to watch as he drives the Aggies into the ground as he rakes in millions rather than sitting on his ass doing the same.  I have nothing against TAMU (I actually like the school) but I loathe Jimbo.  He is not a good coach but he has ridden the coattails of several above average athletes.  Even though one of them was a crab thief.  I don’t like him either.

Sounds like the ravings of a limber-dicked cocksucker.

Can you tell I'm rewatching Deadwood?  I'm being pretty subtle about it, so I thought you might need a flashing neon sign.  Cocksucker.
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
You can keep a wooden stake in your trunk
On the off-chance that the fairy tales ain't bunk
And Imma keep a bottle of that funk
To get motel parking lot, balcony crunk.

War Damn Six

  • ****
  • 651
  • Pale Rider
Re: Pre-Dick-Shuns Week Butt Sechs
« Reply #6 on: October 03, 2023, 06:39:45 PM »
Sounds like the ravings of a limber-dicked cocksucker.

Can you tell I'm rewatching Deadwood?  I'm being pretty subtle about it, so I thought you might need a flashing neon sign.  Cocksucker.

I tried watching Deadwood right after The Sopranos years ago. Could. Not. Do. It.  Not sure why. 

I hate Jimbo.  He sucks a mighty cock.
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
“If you're waitin' for a woman to make up her mind, you may have a long wait.” Preacher

chinook

  • ****
  • 5647
Re: Pre-Dick-Shuns Week Butt Sechs
« Reply #7 on: October 03, 2023, 10:01:21 PM »
Kentucky beats Georgia. 
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions

Re: Pre-Dick-Shuns Week Butt Sechs
« Reply #8 on: October 03, 2023, 10:51:48 PM »
Kentucky beats Georgia.

I like this take.
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
Don't rush me, sonny. You rush a miracle man, you get rotten miracles.

wesfau2

  • ***
  • 13840
  • I love it when you call me Big Poppa
Re: Pre-Dick-Shuns Week Butt Sechs
« Reply #9 on: October 04, 2023, 07:53:41 AM »
I tried watching Deadwood right after The Sopranos years ago. Could. Not. Do. It.  Not sure why. 


Unredeemable character flaw on your part.
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
You can keep a wooden stake in your trunk
On the off-chance that the fairy tales ain't bunk
And Imma keep a bottle of that funk
To get motel parking lot, balcony crunk.

Buzz Killington

  • *
  • 22895
  • Bofa
Re: Pre-Dick-Shuns Week Butt Sechs
« Reply #10 on: October 04, 2023, 08:12:52 AM »
Check your messages, dickweed. Or message me on Facebook so I can get in on that group text.
New phone, who dis?
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

The Six

  • ***
  • 4533
  • Leaning on a broken fence b/t past & present tense
    • My Linktree
Re: Pre-Dick-Shuns Week Butt Sechs
« Reply #11 on: October 04, 2023, 11:12:43 AM »
Games past the Red River Situation this week suck. Good weekend to change the oil, touch some grass, maybe even a titty, but more likely some collbeer.

Broadway Musicals - 47
All Hat Some Cattle - 45
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
"I'm sick of following my dreams...I'm just going to ask them where they are going and hook up with 'em later." - Mitch Hedberg

Snaggletiger

  • *
  • 44514
  • My Fighting Pearls
Re: Pre-Dick-Shuns Week Butt Sechs
« Reply #12 on: October 04, 2023, 12:14:49 PM »
The one thing we had some success with against FUGA, was running the ball.  Being that I was watching Kentucky and Gusty Gator off and on, and really just checking what was going on, I totally forgot that Kentucky running back, Ray Davis, went off for 280 yards.  He's averaging almost 8 yards a carry on the season, and has 8 TD's. 

This game may be a bit tighter than I first expected.  Could get interesting.
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

War Damn Six

  • ****
  • 651
  • Pale Rider
Re: Pre-Dick-Shuns Week Butt Sechs
« Reply #13 on: October 04, 2023, 01:32:21 PM »
Unredeemable character flaw on your part.

Oh, I have many more than this.  Just now getting into Dexter. 
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
“If you're waitin' for a woman to make up her mind, you may have a long wait.” Preacher

Re: Pre-Dick-Shuns Week Butt Sechs
« Reply #14 on: October 04, 2023, 07:18:01 PM »
UK pulls the upset that we started.

They’re a football school now 31
They bark at people 27
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions

Snaggletiger

  • *
  • 44514
  • My Fighting Pearls
Re: Pre-Dick-Shuns Week Butt Sechs
« Reply #15 on: October 05, 2023, 10:55:01 AM »
It's so hard to get a good read from statistics, even after 5 games.  A&M got smoked by Miami through the air, to the tune of 48 points.  But, they're still #5 in the country in total defense.  They've played two twinkies, Auburn and Arkansas.  Is that a good indicator?

In conference, A&M is #1 in overall D, really good against the run.  Bama is 5th overall.

A&M is 6th in total offense, while Bama is 11th, and has just barely better numbers than Auburn in the passing game.

I watched a good bit of the A&M/Arky game.  Max Johnson may be just what the Faggies need.  He's pretty dang accurate, and can take off when needed. 

I'm starting to talk myself into a different pre-dick-shun on this one.
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

Buzz Killington

  • *
  • 22895
  • Bofa
Re: Pre-Dick-Shuns Week Butt Sechs
« Reply #16 on: October 06, 2023, 02:26:15 PM »
I'm starting to talk myself into a different pre-dick-shun on this one.
Come on in, the water's fine
friendly
0
funny
0
like
0
dislike
0
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
No reactions
Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.