Tigers X - Number one Source to Talk Auburn Tigers Sports
The Library => Haley Center Basement => Topic started by: Godfather on April 13, 2017, 08:23:10 AM
-
Terrorists in Turkey decided to take some Americans as hostages. They run across two Sailors and a Marine on Shore Leave. In the course of tieing them up one of the terrorist's mask slips off. He asks one of the Sailors, "Did you see my face?"
The Sailor answers yes, and the terrorist shoots him. Then the terrorist turns to the second Sailor. "Did you see my face?"
"No, but the MARINE did..."
HAPPY BIRTHDAY JARHEAD.....YOU PANSY ASS FAGGOT!
-
Happy Birthday Jarhead, from Clark and myself!
(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Cq5IbJdWIAQyy23.jpg)
-
Been sitting on that one for a while, Buzz?
-
Happy birthday you fucking air winger
-
One day, a Marine Gunnery Sergeant was invited to dine with his Commander in the field mess.
When they entered the mess area they found the place quite crowded.
They finally noticed a table with two empty chairs. There were three lieutenants seated there, so the Colonel asked if they might join them. The lieutenants, of course, promptly invited them to join the table. The Colonel and the Gunny ordered lunch and engaged in light conversation as they ate.
At one point the Gunny mentioned that he had observed characteristics about many officers from which he could normally determine the sources of their commissioning. The lieutenants were eager to hear about this and asked if he could tell how each of them had been commissioned.
The Gunny turned to the lieutenant on his left and said that the he had received his commission through attendance at ROTC. The young officer confirmed that this was indeed correct and asked how the Gunny had figured determined this. The Gunny replied that by his conversation the lieutenant seemed to have a strong academic background but limited military experience.
The Gunny then told the lieutenant on his right that he had gone through OCS after previously serving as an enlisted man. The lieutenant confirmed that was indeed the case, and asked how the Gunny had figured it out. The Gunny replied that the lieutenant's conversation indicated that he had a firm military background and a lot of common sense, but not much book learning.
At this, the third lieutenant asked the Gunny if he had determined how he had received his commission. The Gunny promptly replied that the lieutenant had graduated from the United States Naval Academy. The young officer stated that this was correct and asked if the Gunny had noticed his high level of intelligence, precise military bearing, or other superior qualities acquired at the Naval Academy. The Gunny replied that it was none of these that had tipped him off, he merely observed the lieutenant's class ring while he was picking his nose.
-
A USMC sniper was real good at his job, and he had a method. He would yell out some insult at the enemy and when someone stood up to reply, BANG - one less insurgent!
After every mission the company commander would ask "How many insurgents have you shot today?"
However, on this particular day when asked about the number killed, he reported "Five killed and I let one go, sir."
"Let one go?" roared the company commander. "What do you mean, you let one go?"
"Well, sir, I yelled out 'Osama is a Homo!' Then this big insurgent stood up and yelled 'Hillary is a Bitch!' I just couldn't shoot a fellow Republican!"
-
Happy Happy.
I heard you cheat at cards. Or something like that.
-
Happy birthday to the Xer referred to as a Mason Cranium!
-
Marines are supposed to be tough guys. I don't understand why people are making fun of you with no regard for the possibility of taking an ass whooping.
Regardless, happy Birthday. May you get more respect in other places than you get here.
-
Happy Birthday
-
(http://i164.photobucket.com/albums/u1/miked0003/17855007_777766922373439_1329942380539057851_o1_zpsherfrrev.jpg) (http://s164.photobucket.com/user/miked0003/media/17855007_777766922373439_1329942380539057851_o1_zpsherfrrev.jpg.html)
-
Happy birthday, Jarhead! I'll not piss on this festive occasion by making cheap and snide cracks about your beloved Corps. I'll not at anytime in this message refer to Marines as the Naval Infantry, Gomer Pyles, Thread Heads, shipboard line standers, or members of the sub-department of the Navy. I'll not make mention of any of that. I'll simply wish you a Happy Birthday, brother!
-
Happy Birthday Jarhead
-
Happy Birthday Jarhead.
-
Indeed Semper Fi and Happy Birthday Devil Dog!!