Tigers X - Number one Source to Talk Auburn Tigers Sports
The Library => Haley Center Basement => Topic started by: Kaos on August 02, 2015, 11:25:54 AM
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Played Friday and Saturday.
On Friday, one of the guys I was playing with got a text on the ninth hole saying that his cousin had committed suicide. After some contemplation we decided to play on.
When I sliced a drive into some trees on 11, I slammed the club in frustration and growled.. "I'm KILLING myself with shots like that." The awkward silence was palpable.
Saturday morning I met a guy who does some behind the scenes political work for me. The course was ridiculously crowded. There was a threesome in front of us, four in front of them and four in front of them that we could see. Behind us was a twosome of women. So the four guys invited us to join them instead of just sitting for ten minutes at each tee box.
One of their group said "we'll probably hear some squawking from the gals behind us, they like to play fast and they might get pissed at a group of five."
The guy who was with me says "Well if they get too antsy, that one on the left can come on down here and we'll play hide the balls in the bush for a while."
The guy from the group we joined says "Since that's my wife, would it be okay if we passed on that?"
And it was his wife. We ended up having lunch with them in the clubhouse.
She was Canadian and quite possibly the most racist person I've ever met. But that's another story.
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Played Friday and Saturday.
On Friday, one of the guys I was playing with got a text on the ninth hole saying that his cousin had committed suicide. After some contemplation we decided to play on.
When I sliced a drive into some trees on 11, I slammed the club in frustration and growled.. "I'm KILLING myself with shots like that." The awkward silence was palpable.
Saturday morning I met a guy who does some behind the scenes political work for me. The course was ridiculously crowded. There was a threesome in front of us, four in front of them and four in front of them that we could see. Behind us was a twosome of women. So the four guys invited us to join them instead of just sitting for ten minutes at each tee box.
One of their group said "we'll probably hear some squawking from the gals behind us, they like to play fast and they might get pissed at a group of five."
The guy who was with me says "Well if they get too antsy, that one on the left can come on down here and we'll play hide the balls in the bush for a while."
The guy from the group we joined says "Since that's my wife, would it be okay if we passed on that?"
And it was his wife. We ended up having lunch with them in the clubhouse.
She was Canadian and quite possibly the most racist person I've ever met. But that's another story.
Canadian, eh? She might be more interested in slipping the puck through the 5-hole.
But nice stories nonetheless - tell us another one, how about the Contemptuous Canuck mommy part?
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Took a Monday off and played 36. First one was a Tour 18, the most rated, over priced course I have ever been on.
(http://i164.photobucket.com/albums/u1/miked0003/20150803_081536_zps3h4amwfe.jpeg) (http://s164.photobucket.com/user/miked0003/media/20150803_081536_zps3h4amwfe.jpeg.html)
Afternoon round was the Cowboys golf club. Fun course with a lot of high risk/high reward shots.
(http://i164.photobucket.com/albums/u1/miked0003/20150712_092433_zpsr6jzyw4m.jpeg) (http://s164.photobucket.com/user/miked0003/media/20150712_092433_zpsr6jzyw4m.jpeg.html)
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Took a Monday off and played 36. First one was a Tour 18, the most rated, over priced course I have ever been on.
(http://i164.photobucket.com/albums/u1/miked0003/20150803_081536_zps3h4amwfe.jpeg) (http://s164.photobucket.com/user/miked0003/media/20150803_081536_zps3h4amwfe.jpeg.html)
Afternoon round was the Cowboys golf club. Fun course with a lot of high risk/high reward shots.
(http://i164.photobucket.com/albums/u1/miked0003/20150712_092433_zpsr6jzyw4m.jpeg) (http://s164.photobucket.com/user/miked0003/media/20150712_092433_zpsr6jzyw4m.jpeg.html)
Why don't your golf stories ever include your score?
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Why don't your golf stories ever include your score?
88 at Tour 41-46
82 at cowboys 41-41
And about 8 beers between the two of them.
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Those are my front 9 scores.
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Those are my front 9 scores.
It was brutal slow on Tour, took about 5 hours on a freaking Monday morning. Two groups in front of us were taking pictures on every hole. None of the holes really looked like what they were suppose to. Our 16-17-18 were suppose to be Amen corner and it wasn't even close except for the giant scoreboard. We were lucky and had coupons cause regular rate was $75.00 for a morning round. (Won't be going back)
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Kaos' stories were more interesting.
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Kaos' stories were more interesting.
That's because he just makes shit up.
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Kaos' stories were more interesting.
I sir, never slice in the woods.
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88 at Tour 41-46
82 at cowboys 41-41
And about 8 beers between the two of them.
Did you get chizzad to total your score there?
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Gambling is illegal at Bushwood.
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88 at Tour 41-46
82 at cowboys 41-41
And about 8 beers between the two of them.
Did you get chizzad to total your score there?
You know golfers and how they do scoring.
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Two more.
First from the holy shit, Batman, what happened files.
Played a course in Phoenix the other day. Not that impressive compared to the other courses I've played out there. Was at a resort, but an older resort and it looked and felt more like a municipal course than a resort locale. Anyhow...
Had to rent clubs and got a set of Nikes. Loved them. Hit every ball well for some reason. Got paired with some Japanese guys who didn't speak much of the english but were decent players. Played the front nine pretty well. Couple of bogies but a birdie on a long putt on eight to finish at one over. Didn't figure I could do much better.
Then the back nine. Keeping up with the Japanese, I parred the first four holes. Bogeyed the fifth. And then angelic lightning struck.
Hit a six iron on fifteen that hit the green, rolled toward the hole and barely ticked off the stick. Three inches from eagle, tap in birdie. Sixteen was a 240-yard Par 4. Hit a 260-yard shot off the tee that rolled up the hill behind the green and back down to the hole. Missed a ten-foot putt for eagle, tap in birdie. Seventeen was a dogleg right par four. 169 to lay up or 239 over some trees to the green. Fuck it, over the trees. Boom. On the green about 30 feet away. Missed the eagle putt by about three feet, slammed home the birdie. Eighteen was a par three, about 160 yards from a teebox that was probably 200 feet above the hole. Dropped a seven iron to about eight feet. Rolled it in. Four straight birdies. Five for the round. I'm lucky to make ONE. Two in a row is a miracle. This? I don't know if I should ever play again. I didn't miss a shot, didn't flub a ball, skull a chip, scuff a putt, nothing. GIR 14 times. I usually average about 210 with the driver. Averaged 245 that day. Just 29 putts. And it was 108 degrees, 10% humidity when I started.
The Japanese guys were keeping score on their ipad. They scored in the mid 70s. I ended at 69. They emailed it to me. Sixty fucking nine. This a week after I struggled through an 96 on Saturday and carded an 83 on Sunday. Sixty fucking nine. My best all time score ever is 68 and that came when I was young, strong and stupid. Scored that playing a nine-hole course back to back and bagged eagles (the only two of my life) on the same par 5 with almost identical shots.
I don't know what to make of it except that I'm selling all the clubs I own and switching to a set of Nikes.
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And now the Canadian woman.
She was probably late 50s, early 60s but with that wind-beaten face you often see on people from the frozen north that makes them look much older than they really are.
She absolutely detests black people apparently. She called them "nickerbockers"
Some of what she had to say:
>Where they came from there was only one nickerbocker. The people in the town just passed him around to do odd jobs, help with chores and that kind of thing. What else were they for?
> She liked staying on the golf course because there were fewer nickerbockers around. She hated going to the grocery store and being "subjected to their sassy attitudes."
> The ones who did come to the golf course didn't know their place and were a nuisance. They're not Tiger Fucking Woods out there. She doesn't like hearing them hoop and holler like they're in the jungle when they're playing the game.
> She has a daughter and she'd ten times rather her daughter bring home a woman and fuck her on the living room floor than show up with a nickerbocker. She doesn't want her daughter talking to them, associating with them or having any contact with them outside what is required for work or (mostly) when she has to deal with them as servers in a restaurant or store clerks. There's no place for nickerbockers in society.
And more...
What's weird is she didn't know me or any of the guys I was playing with at all. We could have had nickerbocker wives or girlfriends. Nickerbocker parents. But she ranted without hesitation.
Southerners are not the "racists" Never really have been.
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Played a course about 2 hours North of Dallas. One of the harder ones I have ever played but some beautiful views:
(http://i164.photobucket.com/albums/u1/miked0003/20150808_144047_zps7nthxdhw.jpeg) (http://s164.photobucket.com/user/miked0003/media/20150808_144047_zps7nthxdhw.jpeg.html)
(http://i164.photobucket.com/albums/u1/miked0003/20150808_123453%2000000002_zpsajlq4b9f.jpeg) (http://s164.photobucket.com/user/miked0003/media/20150808_123453%2000000002_zpsajlq4b9f.jpeg.html)
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Hit a six iron on fifteen that hit the green, rolled toward the hole and barely ticked off the stick. Three inches from eagle, tap in birdie. Sixteen was a 240-yard Par 4. Hit a 260-yard shot off the tee that rolled up the hill behind the green and back down to the hole. Missed a ten-foot putt for eagle, tap in birdie. Seventeen was a dogleg right par four. 169 to lay up or 239 over some trees to the green. Fuck it, over the trees. Boom. On the green about 30 feet away. Missed the eagle putt by about three feet, slammed home the birdie. Eighteen was a par three, about 160 yards from a teebox that was probably 200 feet above the hole. Dropped a seven iron to about eight feet. Rolled it in. Four straight birdies. Five for the round. I'm lucky to make ONE. Two in a row is a miracle. This? I don't know if I should ever play again. I didn't miss a shot, didn't flub a ball, skull a chip, scuff a putt, nothing. GIR 14 times. I usually average about 210 with the driver. Averaged 245 that day. Just 29 putts. And it was 108 degrees, 10% humidity when I started.
I think you should keep playing, I don't believe the heavy stuff is gonna come down for awhile.