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The Library => Haley Center Basement => Topic started by: Townhallsavoy on May 18, 2011, 05:20:08 PM

Title: Am I Jewish
Post by: Townhallsavoy on May 18, 2011, 05:20:08 PM
We had a relative from Sicily write our family a letter, and he informed us that my great-great-great grandfather and his wife were from Israel. 

So does that make me Jewish? 
Title: Re: Am I Jewish
Post by: Buzz Killington on May 18, 2011, 05:24:20 PM
How much do you usually tip the wait staff?
Title: Re: Am I Jewish
Post by: Townhallsavoy on May 18, 2011, 05:28:13 PM
How much do you usually tip the wait staff?

Anti-semite!  Titan!  Ban this man!
Title: Re: Am I Jewish
Post by: AU_Tiger_2000 on May 18, 2011, 05:32:47 PM
We had a relative from Sicily write our family a letter, and he informed us that my great-great-great grandfather and his wife were from Israel. 

So does that make me Jewish?

From that long ago you may be an Arab.  Have you ever felt the urge to kill innocent bystanders?
Title: Re: Am I Jewish
Post by: BZ770 on May 18, 2011, 05:45:20 PM
I believe the rule is that your mother has to be jewish.  You can have an Arab Father and a jewish mom and you'd be jewish, but if your Father was a jew and your mom was an Arab you wouldn't be jewish.  So If your GGG Grandma was jewish you'd might be but if you go back that far we probably have all kinds of ethnics in our gene pool.
Title: Re: Am I Jewish
Post by: Townhallsavoy on May 18, 2011, 07:13:24 PM
I believe the rule is that your mother has to be jewish.  You can have an Arab Father and a jewish mom and you'd be jewish, but if your Father was a jew and your mom was an Arab you wouldn't be jewish.  So If your GGG Grandma was jewish you'd might be but if you go back that far we probably have all kinds of ethnics in our gene pool.

My mother's flipping out about it.  She thinks it's big news. 

I'm a bit meh.  I thought I'd get some kind of government handout.
Title: Re: Am I Jewish
Post by: War Eagle!!! on May 18, 2011, 08:16:40 PM
I thought I'd get some kind of government handout.

I bet you would be surprised...

Title: Re: Am I Jewish
Post by: AUsweetheart on May 18, 2011, 08:37:51 PM

I'm a bit meh.  I thought I'd get some kind of government handout.
for being one of the world's oldest money makers?

Looking to make a dollar, how Jewish of you.
Title: Re: Am I Jewish
Post by: Tiger Wench on May 18, 2011, 08:57:53 PM
So does that make me Jewish?

Why don't you drop trou, take a picture, and let us decide?
Title: Re: Am I Jewish
Post by: GarMan on May 18, 2011, 09:12:32 PM
My mother's flipping out about it.  She thinks it's big news. 

I'm a bit meh.


What?  Sorry...  That's what being an American is all about.  We're all mutts to some degree, and there isn't anything wrong wiff dat.   

I thought I'd get some kind of government handout. 

Nah...  I think you need to have savage blood in you for that, and then, you might also be eligible for casino money from the local reservation. 
Title: Re: Am I Jewish
Post by: Snaggletiger on May 19, 2011, 09:00:31 AM
Townhallsavoystein
Title: Re: Am I Jewish
Post by: Tiger Wench on May 19, 2011, 11:13:06 AM
Why don't you drop trou, take a picture, and let us decide?

Still waiting!  Quit your kvetching and show us your putz already!  What, you think I got all day to sit here and wait on you, you nebbish momzer?   Oy!  I bet you got bupkes... you are probably gornisht helfn.

(Side note:  I sometimes wish I was Jewish just so I could use Yiddish phrases in everyday conversation... LOVE it - always just the right turn of phrase to express what you really feel.)
Title: Re: Am I Jewish
Post by: CCTAU on May 19, 2011, 11:23:36 AM
Actually, you are probably more black than anything else. According to David Gregory, you should be getting your food stamps soon.....
Title: Re: Am I Jewish
Post by: AUsweetheart on May 19, 2011, 11:46:49 AM
Actually, you are probably more black than anything else.

Nah...we would have gotten the pics already.
Title: Re: Am I Jewish
Post by: Tiger Wench on May 19, 2011, 12:57:42 PM
Nah...we would have gotten the pics already.
Sweets for the win!!!!!!!!   :rofl:
Title: Re: Am I Jewish
Post by: GarMan on May 19, 2011, 02:09:15 PM
Sweets for the win!!!!!!!!   :rofl: 

Perverts... 
Title: Re: Am I Jewish
Post by: AWK on May 19, 2011, 02:24:36 PM
It's rather simply really, answer this question and I can tell you whether your Jewish.


Quote
On a nice Saturday, I like to go ____________.
Title: Re: Am I Jewish
Post by: MarkChand on May 19, 2011, 02:55:14 PM
Who's the most popular man at a jewish nude beach?

The guy who can carry 2 cups of coffee and a dozen bagels

Who's the most poular lady at the jewish nude beach?

The girl who can eat the last bagel....