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The Library => Auburn Culinary Center => Topic started by: Birmingham on May 23, 2010, 01:22:02 AM

Title: So that we can identify the limp wristed cock suckers here
Post by: Birmingham on May 23, 2010, 01:22:02 AM
Will those who receive cock in their ass do something to identify yourself in this thread so the rest of us we'll  know to stay away from you? 

How about, oh I don't know, posting a food recipe.  Yeah, let's use that.  If you like the feel of a big cock down your throat, let us all know by posting your favorite food recipe.
Title: Re: Is there anything I can do to become a respected member of Tigersx.net?
Post by: CheeseDik on May 23, 2010, 02:41:15 AM
I think the fact that you drive around our suburban neighborhoods in a white van with tinted windows preying upon our children has done you in and there's no "turning a new leaf" for the sick phuck that you are.

I could care less what you've written on an intergore message board about Auburn when your true incongruous behavior lies in the wake of the helpless victims, both our children and our pets, that you've stripped of innocence just because no adult woman in her right mind has ever given you the time of day.

Do us all a favor and go play in traffic you sick, twisted, immoral, low-life phuck. .
Title: Re: Is there anything I can do to become a respected member of Tigersx.net?
Post by: jmar on May 23, 2010, 08:58:11 AM
I've had a change of heart.  I've seen the error of my ways and want to become a member that people appreciate and like.  I understand that there are consequences to how I've acted the past 2 years.  Is it even possible?  Can I become a respected member of TigersX or have I gone to far?  Will you all forgive me and allow me to turn over a new leaf?

Why so contrite son?  Are you not happy being in the 60-70 % range?
                                             



Title: Re: Is there anything I can do to become a respected member of Tigersx.net?
Post by: Jumbo on May 23, 2010, 09:42:44 AM

The quote function always wins. :thumsup:
Title: Re: Is there anything I can do to become a respected member of Tigersx.net?
Post by: Jumbo on May 23, 2010, 09:45:38 AM
Servings: Serves 6–8

Ingredients:


Paula Deen's Hash Brown Casserole
3 Tbsp. butter
1 small yellow onion , chopped
4 cups frozen shredded hash browns
1 pound bulk sausage , mild, hot or sage
2 1/4 cups whole milk
8 large eggs
1 tsp. salt
1/4 tsp. black pepper
1/4 tsp. freshly ground nutmeg
2 Tbsp. Dijon mustard
8 cups cubed French or Italian bread , crusts removed
2 cups (1/2 pound) grated cheddar cheese
2 cups (1/2 pound) freshly grated Parmesan
Directions:

Preheat the oven to 350°.

Spray a deep 13" x 9" casserole dish with vegetable oil cooking spray.

Melt the butter in a large frying pan. Add the onion and sauté over medium-low heat until soft, about 5 minutes. Add the hash browns and break apart. Sauté until soft, about 5 minutes.

In a second frying pan, sauté the sausage, breaking apart large clumps. When the sausage is cooked through, remove it from pan.

In a large mixing bowl, combine the milk, eggs, salt, pepper, nutmeg and mustard, and briskly stir to blend.

To assemble, spread the onions and hash browns evenly at the bottom of the greased dish. Place the bread cubes evenly on top of hash browns. With a slotted spoon, distribute sausage as the third layer. Pour the milk and egg mixture over these layers. Add Parmesan as the next layer, while then adding the cheddar*.

Bake the casserole uncovered for 45 to 50 minutes, until puffed and golden brown.

*Cook's note: Save a few tablespoons of cheddar for the last 10 minutes of baking, when you can add a fresh topping of melted cheddar.
Title: Re: Is there anything I can do to become a respected member of Tigersx.net?
Post by: boartitz on May 23, 2010, 10:40:08 AM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wfu16P5dQo8# (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wfu16P5dQo8#)
Title: Re: Is there anything I can do to become a respected member of Tigersx.net?
Post by: Pell City Tiger on May 23, 2010, 08:45:07 PM
It's my opinion that Paula Dean uses way too many onions in her food. I like her recipies, but prefer to reduce the onion content by 2/3rds.
Title: Re: Is there anything I can do to become a respected member of Tigersx.net?
Post by: jmar on May 23, 2010, 08:51:37 PM
They sell some swell smaller onions at the Piggly Wiggly for ones cooking needs.
Title: Re: Is there anything I can do to become a respected member of Tigersx.net?
Post by: boartitz on May 23, 2010, 08:57:33 PM
It's my opinion that Paula Dean uses way too many onions in her food. I like her recipies, but prefer to reduce the onion content by 2/3rds.
I'll bet that Paula's farts stink.
Title: Re: Is there anything I can do to become a respected member of Tigersx.net?
Post by: Pell City Tiger on May 23, 2010, 09:04:39 PM
I'll bet that Paula's farts stink.
No doubt. Most likely a paint peeler. With all the onions, peppers, and shit she cooks with; I bet she sounds off like Gabriel's horn. Just watching her cook gives me gas.

I like that Good Eats show on the Food Network.
Title: Re: Is there anything I can do to become a respected member of Tigersx.net?
Post by: jmar on May 23, 2010, 09:06:35 PM
I'll bet that Paula's farts stink.
You WANT her, don't you?
Title: Re: Is there anything I can do to become a respected member of Tigersx.net?
Post by: Pell City Tiger on May 23, 2010, 09:08:38 PM
They sell some swell smaller onions at the Piggly Wiggly for ones cooking needs.
I'm a good half hours drive from the nearest Pig. The local Winn-Dixie only stocks the softball sized onions.
Title: Re: Is there anything I can do to become a respected member of Tigersx.net?
Post by: bottomfeeder on May 23, 2010, 09:41:18 PM
I've had a change of heart.  I've seen the error of my ways and want to become a member that people appreciate and like.  I understand that there are consequences to how I've acted the past 2 years.  Is it even possible?  Can I become a respected member of TigersX or have I gone to far?  Will you all forgive me and allow me to turn over a new leaf?

Make love to the girl in your avatar after having a meaningful relationship with her for six months. Then give us all of the details and a video to back it up.
Title: Re: Is there anything I can do to become a respected member of Tigersx.net?
Post by: boartitz on May 23, 2010, 10:45:50 PM
You WANT her, don't you?
:tongue:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MawQeAlsOEs# (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MawQeAlsOEs#)
Title: Re: Is there anything I can do to become a respected member of Tigersx.net?
Post by: Tiger Wench on May 23, 2010, 10:52:35 PM
We might consider respecting you more posthumously.
Title: Re: Is there anything I can do to become a respected member of Tigersx.net?
Post by: Jumbo on May 24, 2010, 01:26:19 AM
Paula Deen's Ooey Gooey Butter Cake + Variations
 
I was watching Paula Deen on QVC this evening, and she was selling her Ooey Gooey Butter Cake for $29 - it's the original cake that she started baking when she started her restaurant. So I Googled it for all of you, found it right away - here it is, with all variations - a great Easter dessert.

~ jan


Note:  A lot of you find this this page thru Google.  If you click here, it will take you to my home page, lots and lots of yummy recipes to browse.  Pinky swear, it's worth the click. ~ jan


Butter Gooey Cakes. Ooey Gooey Butter Cakes. Ooey Booey Gooey Cakes. These are just a few of
the names I've heard our guests at The Lady & Sons call 'em. But to quote Shakespeare:

What's in a name? that which we call a rose
By any other name would smell as sweet.

This is exactly how I feel about our Gooey Butter Cakes. No matter what you call them, they're like that sweet rose that Shakespeare wrote about. These delectable cakes were an instant hit the first day they showed up in The Bag Lady basket and they immediately became one of my most requested items. These little sweeties actually resemble a bar-type dessert instead of what we know as a traditional cake. Over the years, I have made every flavor imaginable, using this basic recipe. I'll give you some of my recommendations but by all means experiment and have fun creating your very own version of our signature Gooey Butter Cakes.

•Cake
•1 (18.25-ounce) box yellow cake mix
•1 egg
•1/2 cup (1 stick) butter, melted
•Filling
•1 (8-ounce) package cream cheese, softened
•2 eggs
•1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract
•1 (16-ounce) box confectioners' sugar
•1/2 cup (1 stick) butter, melted


1.Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Lightly grease a 13x9x2-inch baking pan.
2.In the bowl of an electric mixer, combine cake mix, egg, and butter and mix well. Pat into the bottom of prepared pan and set aside.
3.Still using an electric mixer, beat cream cheese until smooth; add eggs and vanilla. Dump in confectioners' sugar and beat well. Reduce speed of mixer and slowly pour in butter. Mix well.
4.Pour filling onto cake mixture and spread evenly. Bake for 40 to 50 minutes. Don't be afraid to make a judgment call on the cooking time, because oven temperatures can vary. You want the center to be a little gooey, so don't bake it past that point!
5.Remove from oven and allow to cool completely. Cut into squares. Just remember that these wonderful little cakes are very, very rich, and a little will go a long way-even for piggies like me!

Pumpkin Gooey: This variation has to be at the top of my list, especially around Thanksgiving. For the cake part, I sometimes use a spice cake mix. I have even used a chocolate cake mix, but I think my favorite is the basic yellow cake mix. Follow the original recipe, adding a 15-ounce can of pumpkin pie filling and an extra egg to the cream cheese filling. Bake as usual, remove from oven, and allow to cool. Cut into squares and top each square with a pecan half. Serve with a dollop of fresh whipped cream. I promise you'll never want pumpkin pie again!

Pineapple Gooey: Add a 20-ounce can of drained crushed pineapple and an extra egg to the cream cheese filling. Proceed as directed above.

Lemon Gooey: Use a lemon cake mix in place of the yellow cake. Add the juice (approximately 1/4 cup) and zest of 2 lemons to the cream cheese filling. Proceed: as directed above.

Carrot Cake Gooey: Use a spice cake mix, and add 1 cup chopped nuts and 1 1/2 cup finely grated carrots to the cream cheese filling. Proceed as directed above.

Peanut Butter Gooey: Use a chocolate cake mix. Add 1 cup creamy peanut butter and an extra egg to cream cheese filling. You can sprinkle the top of batter with 1 cup chopped peanuts if you like. Proceed as directed above.

Chocolate Chip Gooey: Use either yellow or chocolate cake mix. Sprinkle 1 cup chocolate chips and 1 cup chopped nuts on top of filling. Proceed as directed above.

Banana Gooey: Use a yellow cake mix. Prepare cream cheese filling as directed, beating in 2 ripe bananas and an extra egg. Proceed as directed above.

Nutty Gooey: Use a yellow cake mix, and add 1 cup chopped nuts to the cake mixture. Proceed as directed above.

Chippy Gooey: Stir 1 cup white chocolate chips, peanut butter chocolate chips, butterscotch morsels, Heath Almond Toffee Bits or Heath Milk Chocolate Toffee Bits into filling. Proceed as directed above.
Title: Re: Is there anything I can do to become a respected member of Tigersx.net?
Post by: Godfather on May 24, 2010, 08:54:58 AM
You love teh gooey
Title: Re: Is there anything I can do to become a respected member of Tigersx.net?
Post by: bottomfeeder on May 24, 2010, 09:16:12 AM
:tongue:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MawQeAlsOEs# (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MawQeAlsOEs#)

Good lawd. Don't they make something for that, like a filter to prevent stomach acid from coming up.
Title: Re: Is there anything I can do to become a respected member of Tigersx.net?
Post by: Snaggletiger on May 24, 2010, 09:24:47 AM
The chicken kabobs I threw on the Weber last night turned out gooood.  Marinated the chicken, red/yellow bell peppers, portobellas all in the same mixture all day.  Soy and teriyaki, a little garlic/roemary seasoning and some secret dust from our local butcher.  Put some pineapple chunks on there as well. 

Even my 9 year old was digging in.
Title: Re: Is there anything I can do to become a respected member of Tigersx.net?
Post by: bottomfeeder on May 24, 2010, 09:48:58 AM
The chicken kabobs I threw on the Weber last night turned out gooood.  Marinated the chicken, red/yellow bell peppers, portobellas all in the same mixture all day.  Soy and teriyaki, a little garlic/roemary seasoning and some secret dust from our local butcher.  Put some pineapple chunks on there as well. 

Even my 9 year old was digging in.

That's what I'm talking about. How did this thread get into food? Maybe B'ham needs to cook for us all. I did a BBQ 275-325°F/smoke Saturday of spares using 3-2-1method. Turned out great. The Texas crutch and the high temps seem to cut down on cooking time which allows for less wood usage. Pecan and hickory.
Title: Re: Is there anything I can do to become a respected member of Tigersx.net?
Post by: GH2001 on May 24, 2010, 09:53:50 AM
That's what I'm talking about. How did this thread get into food? Maybe B'ham needs to cook for us all. I did a BBQ 275-325°F/smoke Saturday of spares using 3-2-1method. Turned out great. The Texas crutch and the high temps seem to cut down on cooking time which allows for less wood usage. Pecan and hickory.

Too hot for spares brother. + 1 though on the Hickory. Best smoking wood eva...
Title: Re: Is there anything I can do to become a respected member of Tigersx.net?
Post by: boartitz on May 24, 2010, 10:20:43 AM
Too hot for spares brother. + 1 though on the Hickory. Best smoking wood eva...
I like red oak. Mix in a little apple and sassafras.
Title: Re: Is there anything I can do to become a respected member of Tigersx.net?
Post by: bottomfeeder on May 24, 2010, 11:10:35 AM
Too hot for spares brother. + 1 though on the Hickory. Best smoking wood eva...

That was top of the pit temp. I think temps at grate level were around 250°F and shit practically fell off the bone. I use pecan to start and finish with hickory or visa versa. I use Oak too, as it gives a less strong flavor and can be used during the crutch time. It's all according to my mood and what I have on hand. I would love to try fruit wood on some Amber Jack and Snapper with low temp, 150-160°F. Next is the Dr.Pepper recipe for sauce.

http://www.cdkitchen.com/recipes/recs/2016/Dr-Pepper-Bbq-Sauce95902.shtml (http://www.cdkitchen.com/recipes/recs/2016/Dr-Pepper-Bbq-Sauce95902.shtml)
Title: Re: Is there anything I can do to become a respected member of Tigersx.net?
Post by: Jumbo on May 24, 2010, 11:13:44 AM
That's what I'm talking about. How did this thread get into food? Maybe B'ham needs to cook for us all. I did a BBQ 275-325°F/smoke Saturday of spares using 3-2-1method. Turned out great. The Texas crutch and the high temps seem to cut down on cooking time which allows for less wood usage. Pecan and hickory.
Every thread B'ham starts will be about food from now on.
Title: Re: Is there anything I can do to become a respected member of Tigersx.net?
Post by: JR4AU on May 24, 2010, 02:46:00 PM
Every thread B'ham starts will be about food from now on.

Whether he means to or not.
Title: Re: Is there anything I can do to become a respected member of Tigersx.net?
Post by: GH2001 on May 24, 2010, 03:42:52 PM
That was top of the pit temp. I think temps at grate level were around 250°F and poop practically fell off the bone. I use pecan to start and finish with hickory or visa versa. I use Oak too, as it gives a less strong flavor and can be used during the crutch time. It's all according to my mood and what I have on hand. I would love to try fruit wood on some Amber Jack and Snapper with low temp, 150-160°F. Next is the Dr.Pepper recipe for sauce.

http://www.cdkitchen.com/recipes/recs/2016/Dr-Pepper-Bbq-Sauce95902.shtml (http://www.cdkitchen.com/recipes/recs/2016/Dr-Pepper-Bbq-Sauce95902.shtml)

Gotcha....nice.

Pecan is good too. Probably isnt used as much as Hickory but a lot rarer so it stands with reason. I have 3 acres of Pecan Trees behind my house so I like to use it as well every chance I get. Hickory will always be my fav though. Ever tried mesquite?


*** Not sure why this post got labeled as SPAM.
Title: Re: Is there anything I can do to become a respected member of Tigersx.net?
Post by: Jumbo on May 24, 2010, 04:03:38 PM
Whether he means to or not.
Eggzactly.
Title: Re: Is there anything I can do to become a respected member of Tigersx.net?
Post by: Snaggletiger on May 24, 2010, 04:08:50 PM
Eggzactly.

I second that, Jumbo...as in jumbo shrimp.  By the way, I have this killer recipe for marinating jumbo shrimp and putting them on the grill. 
Title: Re: Is there anything I can do to become a respected member of Tigersx.net?
Post by: JR4AU on May 24, 2010, 04:20:03 PM
We might consider respecting you more posthumously.

Creating his own posthumousitiness would be the only thing he could do to earn my respect.
Title: Re: Is there anything I can do to become a respected member of Tigersx.net?
Post by: bottomfeeder on May 24, 2010, 04:35:23 PM
I second that, Jumbo...as in jumbo shrimp.  By the way, I have this killer recipe for marinating jumbo shrimp and putting them on the grill.  

Share...The Oyster House on the Causeway in Mobile, AL has excellent grilled shrimp, but I prefer to do my own.

We go to Joe Patti's seafood in P'cola for the Ruby reds and do a NOLA style BBQ Shrimp with French Bread for major dipping.

http://www.joepattis.com/ (http://www.joepattis.com/)

http://casualkitchen.blogspot.com/2007/02/most-glorious-meal-so-far-this-year.html (http://casualkitchen.blogspot.com/2007/02/most-glorious-meal-so-far-this-year.html)

Here's another one I like, but I prefer Prudhomme's beer and butter recipe over this one..

http://www.mybargainbuddy.com/forums/showthread.php?t=55774 (http://www.mybargainbuddy.com/forums/showthread.php?t=55774)
Title: Re: Is there anything I can do to become a respected member of Tigersx.net?
Post by: GH2001 on May 25, 2010, 09:30:41 AM
That was top of the pit temp. I think temps at grate level were around 250°F and poop practically fell off the bone. I use pecan to start and finish with hickory or visa versa. I use Oak too, as it gives a less strong flavor and can be used during the crutch time. It's all according to my mood and what I have on hand. I would love to try fruit wood on some Amber Jack and Snapper with low temp, 150-160°F. Next is the Dr.Pepper recipe for sauce.

http://www.cdkitchen.com/recipes/recs/2016/Dr-Pepper-Bbq-Sauce95902.shtml (http://www.cdkitchen.com/recipes/recs/2016/Dr-Pepper-Bbq-Sauce95902.shtml)

I use Pecan a lot too...but only because I have an orchard full of pecan trees. I like Hickory better as it seems to burn the best, but the flavor of Pecan is better to me. Oak is ok - less strong is a good way to describe it.   Ever tried Mesquite?
Title: Re: Is there anything I can do to become a respected member of Tigersx.net?
Post by: Godfather on May 25, 2010, 12:45:20 PM
*** Not sure why this post got labeled as SPAM.
Sorry new spam filter, we seem to be getting hit with a ton of spam lately, if a posts of yours gets nuked just shoot me a PM.  I'll reinstate it.

Somehow though it doesnt seem to be working on birmingham.
Title: Re: Is there anything I can do to become a respected member of Tigersx.net?
Post by: Snaggletiger on May 25, 2010, 12:48:03 PM
Sorry new spam filter, we seem to be getting hit with a ton of spam lately, if a posts of yours gets nuked just shoot me a PM.  I'll reinstate it.

Somehow though it doesnt seem to be working on birmingham.

You can't nuke Birmingspam?
Title: Please don't post any more food recipes
Post by: Birmingham on May 25, 2010, 02:44:49 PM
in response to my posts.
Title: Re: Please don't post any more food recipes
Post by: JR4AU on May 25, 2010, 02:49:08 PM
in response to my posts.

Yummy: Lemon Pudding Cake

Ingredients
4 eggs, separated
1/3 cup lemon juice
1 teaspoon lemon zest
1 tablespoon butter
1 1/2 cups white sugar
1/2 cup sifted all-purpose flour
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 1/2 cups milk

Directions
Beat together egg yolks, lemon juice, lemon rind, and butter or margarine until thick and lemon colored. Combine sugar, flour, and salt; add alternately with milk to the yolk mixture, beating well after each addition.
Beat egg whites until stiff. Blend egg whites into batter on low speed of electric mixer. Pour into 8 inch square baking dish.
Place a pan of hot water in the oven, and set the baking dish into the pan. Bake at 350 degrees F (175 degrees C) for 45 minutes.
Title: Re: Please don't post any more food recipes
Post by: boartitz on May 25, 2010, 02:50:55 PM
Eat a nut.

Rocky Mountain Oysters Recipe

2 pounds calf testicles*
2 cups beer
2 eggs, beaten
1 ½ cups all-purpose flour
¼ cup yellow cornmea1
Salt and ground black pepper to taste
Vegetable oil**
1 tablespoon hot pepper sauce

*  Be sure to ask your butcher for calf testicles, not bull testicles. Calf testicles are the size of a walnut and are much more tender than the larger bull testicles.

** Use enough vegetable oil to fill your frying container halfway to the top (to allow for bubbling up and splattering) and to completely cover calf testicles while frying.

With a very sharp knife, split the tough skin-like muscle that surrounds each testicle. Remove the skin (you can remove the skin easily if the testicles are frozen, then peel while thawing). Slice each testicle into approximately 1/4- to 1/2-inch-thick ovals. Place slices in a large pan or blow with enough beer to cover them; cover and let sit 2 hours.

In a shallow bowl, combine eggs, flour, cornmeal, salt, and pepper. Remove testicles from beer; drain and dredge thoroughly in the flour mixture. In a large, deep pot, heat oil to 375 degrees F. Deep fry 3 minutes or until golden brown (will rise to the surface when done). Drain on paper towels.

Serve warm with your favorite hot pepper sauce.
Title: Re: Is there anything I can do to become a respected member of Tigersx.net?
Post by: boartitz on May 25, 2010, 02:53:08 PM
Sorry new spam filter, we seem to be getting hit with a ton of spam lately, if a posts of yours gets nuked just shoot me a PM.  I'll reinstate it.

Somehow though it doesnt seem to be working on birmingham.
It's them fucking Latvians and their hard on pills. Block their IPs.
Title: Re: Please don't post any more food recipes
Post by: AUsweetheart on May 25, 2010, 02:54:12 PM
Boozy Brownies

Prep Time: 45 minutes

Cook Time: 35 minutes

Total Time: 80 minutes

Ingredients:

1 (21 oz.) fudge brownie mix (or brownies made from your favorite recipe)
1/4 cup bourbon
1 cup butter
3 Tablespoons rum
2 cups powdered sugar
1 cup semi-sweet chocolate chips
1 Tablespoon solid vegetable shortening
Preparation:

Bake brownies according to package directions.
Drizzle brownies with bourbon as soon as they are removed from the oven; refrigerate.

Cream butter, rum and powdered sugar. Spread on cooled brownies. Refrigerate again. When cold, melt chocolate chips and shortening. Spread or drizzle quickly on top of brownies. Chill.
Title: Re: Please don't post any more food recipes
Post by: Snaggletiger on May 25, 2010, 02:59:11 PM
Boozy Brownies?  Shouldn't you be studying or something?
Title: Re: Please don't post any more food recipes
Post by: GH2001 on May 25, 2010, 03:06:07 PM
Boozy Brownies

Prep Time: 45 minutes

Cook Time: 35 minutes

Total Time: 80 minutes

Ingredients:

1 (21 oz.) fudge brownie mix (or brownies made from your favorite recipe)
1/4 cup bourbon
1 cup butter
3 Tablespoons rum
2 cups powdered sugar
1 cup semi-sweet chocolate chips
1 Tablespoon solid vegetable shortening
Preparation:

Bake brownies according to package directions.
Drizzle brownies with bourbon as soon as they are removed from the oven; refrigerate.

Cream butter, rum and powdered sugar. Spread on cooled brownies. Refrigerate again. When cold, melt chocolate chips and shortening. Spread or drizzle quickly on top of brownies. Chill.

That's a real stretch on the title of that recipe with only 1/4 cup of Bourbon and wee bit of Rum.
Title: Re: Please don't post any more food recipes
Post by: AUsweetheart on May 25, 2010, 03:07:08 PM
Boozy Brownies?  Shouldn't you be studying or something?
I should be...but there are a ton of ambulances going by today....and I love to watch those lawyers that care run. :)
Title: Re: Please don't post any more food recipes
Post by: Jumbo on May 25, 2010, 03:10:46 PM
Suck on it Douche

Pound Cake
The Ultimate Comfort Cake
by Michele W. Gerhard

Have you ever stopped to think about your "irresistible list"? You know what I mean - things that always get your attention, make
your heart beat faster. At the top of my husband's list, for example,
is a Porsche 928. He doesn't own one yet, but he does have quite
a collection of pictures, and he can't resist reading an article about
one, or buying a magazine featuring his dream car on the cover.
Perhaps you've never taken the time to actually put your list in writing, but I'll bet your sub-conscious mind has one.

It's either a blessing or a curse, depending on how you choose to look at it, that I've always leaned somewhat toward self-indulgence. Therefore, my list of irresistibles is rather long. Very close to the top is one of the simplest, most basic, yet most satisfying, comforting desserts in all the world: pound cake. I absolutely cannot resist a
new recipe for pound cake, despite the fact that my collection,
as of this writing, already includes an astounding 62, not including
the ones contained in an extensive cookbook collection! I make no
apologies for what may appear to the more stoical among you as
over-indulgence, perhaps bordering on gluttony. But what about
the pursuit of excellence?

Let's face it, if I had stopped looking after finding the first one,
how could I possibly have found the BEST? And after all, the
good, simple, basic pleasures of life speak to a part of us that
longs for warmth, stability, security. In today's rapidly changing, fast-paced world, our hearts cry out for simplicity. To me,
pound cake says, "Home".

Please don't misunderstand me. I appreciate a beautiful Bûche
de Noel or Charlotte Malakoff aux Framboises just as much as
the next foodaholic. In fact, I have seen Napoleons that I consider true works of art, if not actual architectural masterpieces. Kudos to each and every one of you out there on the cutting edge. My hat is off to you. I greatly admire and respect your Mousse d'Asperge sur Tuiles aux Amandes. I stand in awe of your Chocolate Rainforest Torte, really I do! But I'll bet even the greatest among you, the
most sophisticated, creative and innovative, has a secret place in
your heart of hearts that really longs for such simple, old-fashioned
pleasures as Mom's pound cake. Just the thought of pound cake in its humble, unpretentious elegance, with its buttery, mouthwatering fragrance, faintly redolent of citrus, conjures up images of hearth
and home like nothing else I know of - except perhaps freshly
baked bread.

Perhaps you are not yet aware of the significant power exerted on the sub-conscious mind by our sense of smell. The recent increasing popularity of aromatherapy bears witness to this elusive energy. Just imagine the carefree childhood memories evoked by the clean scent of freshly mown grass, or the romantic reveries aroused by our beloved's signature fragrance. There are clever real estate agents who place a dab of vanilla on light bulbs before showing a house
to prospective clients due to its ability to evoke feelings of warmth
and comfort. All of this, thanks to our olfactory nerve's ability to transport scent molecules to the limbic system. Well, do I ever
have a great idea! Just bake a pound cake right before showing
the house and watch your sales skyrocket. Who would be able
to resist?

So, how did this love affair with pound cake begin? I suppose
it's always had a special place in my heart, but the romance really started when our elder son (then called Kevin, now Keegan) was
three years old. As I recall he had chicken pox - not a severe case, but certainly enough to keep him in bed for a few days. He was quarantined to the house just long enough to stretch my creativity
to the limit in an effort to relieve his restlessness. No doubt the
mothers among you will have no difficulty relating to my dilemma.

Since I had recently added "Old Dominion Pound Cake" to my repertoire, I decided to bake it for him. We snuggled up together
on the sofa with comfy-cozy blankets and a very select assortment of stuffed animal guests, and had a truly memorable afternoon. I read aloud to him from his favorite books, and he absolutely de- voured an astonishing amount of pound cake. A lot of important bonding took place that day. I can't help believing that the cake played a significant role in what turned out to be a milestone in the development of one of the most significant relationships in my life.

"Old Dominion Pound Cake" has become a tradition in our family.
It is automatically included on our Christmas menu, even though
its appearance could not be described as particularly festive. But Christmas is, first and foremost, about love, and so is this cake. I
am always happy to bake it on demand when my son (or anyone
else near and dear to me) feels a special need for the kind of nurturing, the sort of soothing comfort, that few things other
than Mom's cooking can provide. Not to mention the delicate
flavor of this tender morsel, a truly delectable cake.
 

Old Dominion Pound Cake

8 large eggs
2 1/4 cups sifted flour
1/4 teaspoon baking soda
1 1/4 cups granulated sugar
1 1/2 cups unsalted butter,
soft enough to be worked easily
2 tablespoons lemon juice
2 1/4 teaspoons vanilla extract
1/8 teaspoon salt
1 cup granulated sugar
1 1/2 teaspoons cream of tartar
Confectioner's sugar for dusting

On the day before serving, let the eggs stand at room temperature
at least 1 hour before using. Meanwhile, butter well, then flour a
large Bundt cake pan. In a medium bowl, sift together flour, soda
and 1 1/4 cups sugar. Preheat oven to 325 degrees F. In a large
bowl with mixer at high speed, cream butter well. Then, with the
mixer at low speed, just barely blend butter with flour mixture,
then with lemon juice and vanilla. With mixer still at low speed,
beat in egg yolks, one at a time, just until blended.
With mixer at high speed, beat egg whites until frothy. Add salt,
and gradually add 1 cup sugar with cream of tartar, beating well
after each addition. Continue to beat the mixture until soft peaks
form. Now gently fold the egg white mixture into the cake batter,
and turn batter into the prepared pan.
With a rubber spatula, gently cut through batter once or twice.
Bake for 1 1/2 hours. Do not open oven door during the first
hour. Turn the oven off and let the cake remain in the oven
for 15 minutes. Then remove cake from the oven and place
on a wire rack and allow it to cool 15 minutes longer. Invert
the cake onto the rack and allow it to finish cooling. Wrap
cake in foil or plastic wrap and store it in a cake saver until
the next day. Just before serving, dust top of cake with
confectioner's sugar.
 

Although the "Old Dominion" is our family's favorite, I've always wondered how authentic it is, as pound cakes go. So I did a little research. The 1913 edition of "The Boston Cooking-School Cook Book" by Fannie Merritt Farmer (which, by the way, was a recent gift from the very same cake-loving son) is probably about as authentic as they come:

"1 pound butter, 1 pound sugar, yolks of 10 eggs,
whites of 10 eggs, 1 pound flour, 1/2 teaspoon mace..."

I was delighted to find that

"The Williamsburg Art of Cookery or Accomplished
Gentlewoman's Companion:
Being a Collection of upwards of Five Hundred of the
most Ancient and Approv'd Recipes in Virginia Cookery"
by Mrs. Helen Bullock,

contains a similar recipe entitled, "Williamsburg Pound Cake":

"Cream one Pound of Butter and one Pound of Sugar together,
add the well beaten Yolks of Twelve Eggs..."

Or the "Mount Vernon Pound Cake":

"Wash all the Salt from a Pound of Butter, then pat it dry between
the Folds of a clean Cloth and set away in a cold Place. Sift one
Pound of Pastry Flour and separate the Yolks and Whites of
twelve Eggs..."

and from the James River Plantations Cookbook, the
"Virginia Pound Cake", with the notation:

"This is the real Virginia pound cake. For generations it has
been served with a glass of Sherry to afternoon guests."

Eggs
Flour
Sugar
Butter
Baking powder
Lemon extract

Weigh the number of eggs you want to use and then weigh that much
sugar and that amount of flour and not quite that much butter. (If you
have a pound of everything else, use a quarter of a pound less of
butter.) Beat the yolks and the whites of the eggs separately. Wash
the salt out of the butter. Cream it until it is very soft. Then begin
to mix the cake by putting a little sugar and then a little flour and
then a little butter, and then a little white of the eggs into the egg
yolks. (Put a level teaspoon of baking powder into the flour.) Con-
tinue to add a little of each until all ingredients are in, beating con-
stantly. After beating until smooth, add lemon. Bake in a tube pan
lined with brown paper in a 325-degree F. oven."

The above recipes bear a distinct similarity to what many consider
to be The Original: the French "quatre-quarts", or four-pound pound cake, alluding to the one pound each of flour, butter, sugar and eggs in the mixture. (Actually, I always thought it meant that I would gain four pounds, which is probably true!) The difference
is primarily in the procedure, which is included in the recipes
below, to satisfy the purists among you.

An occasional well-meaning critic of my beloved "Old Dominion" would quip, "Well, of course it's perfectly delicious, dahlin', better than those heavy ol' authentic recipes..." And I would pout for just
a bit, thinking that my ideal was perhaps not the real thing after all, since it was "lightened " by the use of egg whites. Not so, not so!
If any of you pound cake fanatics out there have a more authentic pound cake recipe you'd like to share with me, please feel free to
do so. But I'll bet my eye teeth you won't be able to find one that
was ever baked with more love than the one I baked for my recuperating three-year-old. To this day, it remains his favorite comfort cake - this despite the fact that he is now Chef Keegan,
a pastry chef of considerable acclaim! As a special treat for the fellow pound cake lovers among you, following are some other
special favorites from my collection:
Title: Re: Please don't post any more food recipes
Post by: Godfather on May 25, 2010, 03:13:07 PM
That's a real stretch on the title of that recipe with only 1/4 cup of Bourbon and wee bit of Rum.
My recipe calls for 4 glasses of rum and just eat the batter.
Title: Re: Please don't post any more food recipes
Post by: AUsweetheart on May 25, 2010, 03:25:27 PM
My recipe calls for 4 glasses of rum and just eat the batter.

We should trade. Rum gives me a terrible hangover, but its the only thing that will make me sing in public.
Title: Re: So that we can identify the limp wristed cock suckers here
Post by: Birmingham on May 25, 2010, 03:33:30 PM
I had no idea there were so many fags here.  I thought one or two but you guys are really taking advantage of this opportunity to identify your gaydom.  Not that there's anything wrong with that.  :rofl: :rofl:
Title: Re: So that we can identify the limp wristed cock suckers here
Post by: Birmingham on May 25, 2010, 03:39:10 PM
poster who have followed the OP's suggestion and busted out of the closet:
Jumbo x6
Harvey Birdman x2
Bottomfeeder x2
GH2001
Boartitz x2
JR4AU
AUsweetheart

Holy shit!  So right now Jumbo's in the lead, or I guess you could say he's pulling up the rear.
Title: Re: So that we can identify the limp wristed cock suckers here
Post by: AUsweetheart on May 25, 2010, 03:40:23 PM
Jumbo, does that Virginia poundcake really have to served with Sherry?

I have tried and tried...but I am just not a sherry fan.
Title: Re: So that we can identify the limp wristed cock suckers here
Post by: Token on May 25, 2010, 03:43:23 PM
Jumbo, does that Virginia poundcake really have to served with Sherry?

I have tried and tried...but I am just not a sherry fan.

I've heard Brandy will work.  And she isn't a stuck up bitch.
Title: Re: So that we can identify the limp wristed cock suckers here
Post by: Birmingham on May 25, 2010, 03:44:27 PM
Jumbo, does that Virginia poundcake really have to served with Sherry?

I have tried and tried...but I am just not a sherry fan.

Evidently he'd rather his poundcakes come with a Jimmy.
Title: Re: So that we can identify the limp wristed cock suckers here
Post by: AUsweetheart on May 25, 2010, 03:49:57 PM
I've heard Brandy will work.  And she isn't a stuck up bitch.

Oh goody. I like Brandy.
Title: Re: So that we can identify the limp wristed cock suckers here
Post by: Godfather on May 25, 2010, 03:51:16 PM
Oh goody. I like Brandy.
Shes a fine girl, I hear she would make a good wife.
Title: Re: So that we can identify the limp wristed cock suckers here
Post by: Snaggletiger on May 25, 2010, 03:54:21 PM
Shes a fine girl, I hear she would make a good wife.

That may be true but my life, my lover and my lady is the sea.

Wait..life? or wife?
Title: Re: So that we can identify the limp wristed cock suckers here
Post by: AUsweetheart on May 25, 2010, 03:57:20 PM
Shes a fine girl, I hear she would make a good wife.

If that is true then she must know that one absolutely should keep a slightly limp wrist while performing fellatio. It's a rookie mistake not to...
That is what this thread was originally about, right?
Title: Re: So that we can identify the limp wristed cock suckers here
Post by: Snaggletiger on May 25, 2010, 03:58:47 PM
If that is true then she must know that one absolutely should keep a slightly limp wrist while performing fellatio. It's a rookie mistake not to...
That is what this thread was originally about, right?


You got here late, didn't you?
Title: Re: So that we can identify the limp wristed cock suckers here
Post by: AUChizad on May 25, 2010, 03:59:14 PM
If that is true then she must know that one absolutely should keep a slightly limp wrist while performing fellatio. It's a rookie mistake not to...
That is what this thread was originally about, right?
Four pages in, this thread finally became relevant to my interests.
Title: Re: So that we can identify the limp wristed cock suckers here
Post by: Buzz Killington on May 25, 2010, 03:59:40 PM
one absolutely should keep a slightly limp wrist while performing fellatio

One of my favorite operas.
Title: Re: So that we can identify the limp wristed cock suckers here
Post by: Godfather on May 25, 2010, 03:59:54 PM
That may be true but my life, my lover and my lady is the sea.

Wait..life? or wife?
Thats a shame I bet at night, after the bars close down, she walks through a silent town, thinking about you.
Title: Re: So that we can identify the limp wristed cock suckers here
Post by: Godfather on May 25, 2010, 04:02:02 PM
Four pages in, this thread finally became relevant to my interests.
Still trying to win Taylor back, eh!




That ship has sailed...its sad, move on.
Title: Re: So that we can identify the limp wristed cock suckers here
Post by: AWK on May 25, 2010, 06:13:54 PM
Still trying to win Taylor back, eh!




That ship has sailed...its sad, move on.
More like a little man on a boat. 

Please don't tip him.
Title: Re: Please don't post any more food recipes
Post by: bottomfeeder on May 25, 2010, 06:32:29 PM
I should be...but there are a ton of ambulances amber lamps going by today....and I love to watch those lawyers that care run. :)

fify
Title: Re: So that we can identify the limp wristed cock suckers here
Post by: Jumbo on May 25, 2010, 07:46:39 PM
Jumbo, does that Virginia poundcake really have to served with Sherry?

I have tried and tried...but I am just not a sherry fan.
You can use Brandi, as godfather said she's a fine girl.
Title: Re: So that we can identify the limp wristed cock suckers here
Post by: CCTAU on May 25, 2010, 11:08:32 PM
Will those who receive cock in their ass do something to identify yourself in this thread so the rest of us we'll  know to stay away from you? 

How about, oh I don't know, posting a food recipe.  Yeah, let's use that.  If you like the feel of a big cock down your throat, let us all know by posting your favorite food recipe.

SHUT UP BITCH!