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Pat Dye Field => Beard-Eaves Memorial Coliseum => Topic started by: Kaos on March 22, 2019, 10:20:22 PM

Title: Following Squeaky J
Post by: Kaos on March 22, 2019, 10:20:22 PM
Top Ten list of possibilities for the (apparently) vacant Alabama basketball job: 

1) Mike Wazowski  - Bama fans are not aware that the one-eyed green monster from Monsters Inc. is not, in fact, the current coach of the Duke Blue Devils.  But they are certain that Wazowski would crawl (or roll in this case) on broken glass to have a shot at coaching games in the asbestos capital of the SEC, Coleman Coliseum.  

2) Adolph Rupp - He may be dead, but he'd come back from that just to stand on the same campus that was once home to Ba'r Brunt.  

3) Dean Smith - Also dead.  See Adolph Rupp. 

4) Ba'r Brunt -   Also dead, but would return to cement his legacy as the GOAT now that Saban has eclipsed his crusty ass in football. 

5) Bill Parcells - He and Bobby Bowden have crawled over broken glass at least a dozen times for the opportunity to coach in Turdscaloosa.  This is his chance. 

6) Roy Williams - He is bored winning titles at UNC and would have a much better chance to build his legacy in front of tens of dozens of fans in Coleman. 

7) Rick Pitino - He's dirty as a pig in a mudhole. Would fit perfectly in the cesspool outside Vance. 

8) Phil Jackson - He's coached some of the best ever.  But he's never coached hairdos like those sported in the mushroom capital of the state.  How could he resist?

9) Greg Popovich - He and Saban would get along well.  They both have the same sunny demeanor and love dealing with the press. He's a natural fit. He would belly crawl over crushed seashells for the chance to work alongside his demeanor doppelganger. 

10)  Geno  - Bama fans can't pronounce his last name and won't try.  But he has a way with women and most of the Tide roster look like ugly girls with mops on their heads. 
Title: Re: Following Squeaky J
Post by: Snaggletiger on March 23, 2019, 10:31:03 AM
Pfffft....no way Rupp takes that job.  
Title: Re: Following Squeaky J
Post by: Buzz Killington on March 25, 2019, 09:30:28 AM
I heard they are going after Norman Dale.  The picket fence is back, baby!
Title: Re: Following Squeaky J
Post by: GH2001 on March 25, 2019, 10:28:11 AM
Rick pitino is who is seriously being mentioned now. 
Title: Re: Following Squeaky J
Post by: The Six on March 25, 2019, 11:05:28 AM
Rick pitino is who is seriously being mentioned now.
Fits their motif. 
Title: Re: Following Squeaky J
Post by: Kaos on March 25, 2019, 11:06:54 AM
Rick pitino is who is seriously being mentioned now.
I put that as a joke.  

Do they really have that much power over the NCAA?
Title: Re: Following Squeaky J
Post by: Buzz Killington on March 25, 2019, 11:26:01 AM
Rick pitino is who is seriously being mentioned now.
That seriously would not surprise me one iota.  Or Richard Pitino with him tagging along.
Title: Re: Following Squeaky J
Post by: Godfather on March 25, 2019, 11:53:07 AM
courtesy of Kaos's favorite al.com


Quote
Byrne should reach out to Rick Pitino when he starts contacting potential candidates. It’s at least worth a phone call or lunch at the Final Four.
People will overreact to that idea, of course, and fake outrage on Twitter because that’s what we do now, but Pitino is, arguably, one of the three greatest college basketball coaches alive, and he’s currently not coaching college basketball.
Is Pitino unhirable for Alabama? Probably so, and for more reasons than one, but he wasn’t arrested by the FBI after its investigation into college basketball corruption, and there currently isn’t a show cause against Pitino by the NCAA. Maybe one is coming, but Pitino has vehemently maintained his innocence.
Pitino was fired by Louisville in the wake of the bombshell case that linked bribes by Adidas to Louisville basketball recruits, but a member of the Alabama basketball team was linked to that investigation and Avery Johnson wasn’t fired. Auburn assistant coach Chuck Person just pled guilty in federal court, but Bruce Pearl wasn’t fired.
It’s a low bar in college basketball, is all I’m saying, and if you can win a national championship the bar doesn’t really exist at all.
Auburn hired Pearl while Pearl was still under a show cause. The gamble paid off for Auburn, and the Tigers are now selling out Auburn Arena and winning championships. Sampson, a rumored early candidate for Alabama, was out of the game for five years under a show cause.
Byrne and his search committee should ask themselves this simple question when they begin interviewing candidates: can this coach win a national championship at Alabama? That’s a short list, but Pitino is on it.
Would SEC commissioner Greg Sankey prevent Alabama from hiring Pitino? Not likely. Pitino would be an enormous draw for the conference. Would the NCAA slap a show cause on Pitino if he tried to return to college coaching? For Bryne, it might be worth finding out.
If you care to read the rest of the drivel.  https://www.al.com/alabamabasketball/2019/03/there-are-logical-coaching-choices-for-alabama-and-then-theres-rick-pitino.html (https://www.al.com/alabamabasketball/2019/03/there-are-logical-coaching-choices-for-alabama-and-then-theres-rick-pitino.html)
Title: Re: Following Squeaky J
Post by: djsimp on March 25, 2019, 12:09:46 PM
courtesy of Kaos's favorite al.com

If you care to read the rest of the drivel.  https://www.al.com/alabamabasketball/2019/03/there-are-logical-coaching-choices-for-alabama-and-then-theres-rick-pitino.html (https://www.al.com/alabamabasketball/2019/03/there-are-logical-coaching-choices-for-alabama-and-then-theres-rick-pitino.html)
Nah, the 1st sentence was plenty.
Title: Re: Following Squeaky J
Post by: CCTAU on March 25, 2019, 01:10:18 PM
Hey Paul. Aubren did it and theys winning now. Why cain't we do it too? We's better'an'em.
Title: Re: Following Squeaky J
Post by: Buzz Killington on March 25, 2019, 02:08:42 PM
Samson wouldn't touch that place with a 10 foot pole...neither would his flowing locks.  
Title: Re: Following Squeaky J
Post by: CCTAU on March 25, 2019, 03:25:45 PM
Samson wouldn't touch that place with a 10 foot pole...neither would his flowing locks. 
You never know. I hear there are a lot of loose Delilahs in that town. Just ask Joey.
Title: Re: Following Squeaky J
Post by: GH2001 on March 25, 2019, 10:04:17 PM
That seriously would not surprise me one iota.  Or Richard Pitino with him tagging along.
Seriously?
Title: Re: Following Squeaky J
Post by: Buzz Killington on March 26, 2019, 09:23:29 AM
Seriously?
Seriously.  Literally even.
Title: Re: Following Squeaky J
Post by: GH2001 on March 26, 2019, 09:56:58 AM
Seriously.  Literally even.
So you’re essentially saying that it isn’t virtually happening. 
Title: Re: Following Squeaky J
Post by: Snaggletiger on March 26, 2019, 10:11:53 AM
So you’re essentially saying that it isn’t virtually happening.
You're virtually taking everything too literally.  That's basically the essence of the reality.
Title: Re: Following Squeaky J
Post by: Buzz Killington on March 26, 2019, 10:24:29 AM
You're virtually taking everything too literally.  That's basically the essence of the reality.
Irregrardless, it's all rumor and in your window at this point.  Seriously.
Title: Re: Following Squeaky J
Post by: Snaggletiger on March 26, 2019, 10:31:53 AM
Irregrardless, it's all rumor and in your window at this point.  Seriously.
In your end....ooooohhhhh
Title: Re: Following Squeaky J
Post by: djsimp on March 26, 2019, 11:08:01 AM
In your end....ooooohhhhh
Who's in your end?
Title: Re: Following Squeaky J
Post by: Snaggletiger on March 26, 2019, 11:51:13 AM
Who's in your end?
Oh no, homey don't play that way.


Unless tequila's involved.
Title: Re: Following Squeaky J
Post by: djsimp on March 26, 2019, 12:37:55 PM
Oh no, homey don't play that way.


Unless tequila's involved.
-100


Correct response is...

DEEZ NUTS!!

(https://media.giphy.com/media/dWfkLpnrZN3QQ/giphy.gif)
Title: Re: Following Squeaky J
Post by: GH2001 on March 26, 2019, 12:46:44 PM
Oh no, homey don't play that way.


Unless tequila's involved.
Get a couple of pbr’s and some dcp in snags and he’ll do anything you want. 
Title: Re: Following Squeaky J
Post by: GH2001 on March 26, 2019, 12:47:21 PM
-100


Correct response is...

DEEZ NUTS!!

(https://media.giphy.com/media/dWfkLpnrZN3QQ/giphy.gif)

Well they certainly won’t be his nuts 
Title: Re: Following Squeaky J
Post by: djsimp on March 26, 2019, 01:10:03 PM
Well they certainly won’t be his nuts
That would make for an interesting threesome.
Title: Re: Following Squeaky J
Post by: Kaos on March 26, 2019, 03:46:46 PM
That would make for an interesting threesome.
Who's got three nuts?
Title: Re: Following Squeaky J
Post by: djsimp on March 26, 2019, 04:07:23 PM
Who's got three nuts?
See, the topic has already sparked Ks interest.