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Kaos' way behind movie reviews

GH2001

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #3180 on: November 15, 2021, 09:24:22 PM »
Bruges is one of the most solid movies in a long time. It and peanut butter falcon are high a top my list of movies from the last 15 years.

Finnes is an absolute riot.
« Last Edit: November 17, 2021, 12:28:03 PM by GH2001 »
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AUTiger1

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #3181 on: November 17, 2021, 11:28:35 AM »
Have I missed a review on 'The Eternals"?   "Shang Ra La,La,La and the Billbo Baggins Ring Legends" was pretty solid.  The kids want to watch "The Eternals" and I need to know if it is something I will need to pay a lot of attention to or if I can catch up on Solitaire Suite on my phone while it's going on. 
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Courage is only fear holding on a minute longer.--George S. Patton

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GH2001

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #3182 on: November 17, 2021, 12:29:44 PM »
Have I missed a review on 'The Eternals"?   "Shang Ra La,La,La and the Billbo Baggins Ring Legends" was pretty solid.  The kids want to watch "The Eternals" and I need to know if it is something I will need to pay a lot of attention to or if I can catch up on Solitaire Suite on my phone while it's going on.

it JUST came out so not sure anyone has seen it on here. I plan on catching it, and the new Ghostbusters in the next 2-4 days.

Its MCU so its probably gonna be solid. Even if its bad by their standards. Their movies just don't suck.
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Kaos

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #3183 on: November 17, 2021, 02:07:16 PM »
Have I missed a review on 'The Eternals"?   "Shang Ra La,La,La and the Billbo Baggins Ring Legends" was pretty solid.  The kids want to watch "The Eternals" and I need to know if it is something I will need to pay a lot of attention to or if I can catch up on Solitaire Suite on my phone while it's going on.

Marvel stepping into wokeness.

It’s off my radar.  I don’t like watermelon even with sugar on it.
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #3184 on: November 17, 2021, 03:29:18 PM »
Have I missed a review on 'The Eternals"?   "Shang Ra La,La,La and the Billbo Baggins Ring Legends" was pretty solid.  The kids want to watch "The Eternals" and I need to know if it is something I will need to pay a lot of attention to or if I can catch up on Solitaire Suite on my phone while it's going on.

Saw it with my daughter.  I didn't really care about the characters, I didn't read the Eternals, so only really went to see how it ties into the MCU as a whole.  I thought the bonus scene in Shang Chi was going to drive the Eternals, but it didn't.  Bonus scene in Eternals could set something up that is pretty interesting, but we will see what happens.

I'd put it in the bottom tier of the MCU films, along with Captain Marvel, Thor 2, and Hulk (the last two I enjoyed more than Eternals, though - and CM had Nick Fury and that cat).
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Kaos

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #3185 on: December 05, 2021, 10:08:22 AM »
The Power of the Dog

Bunkledip Clumperskin as a Montana cowboy in 1925. With Todd from Breaking Bad - Jesse Plemon - as his brother, one of the Mary Jane Watson's - Kristen Dunst - as a hotel owner, and other people you know from other things along the way (Girl Next Door nerd - Paul Dano, Chester from Law and Order the SUV - Adam Beach, Handmaid June - Elisabeth Moss, old Moria from American Horror Story-Frances Conroy, Agent Lundy- Keith Carradine- from Dexter, etc.) 

I'm not done with it, but it's (so far) not very good.  Stilted dialogue, Crimpledung's shit accent (although I've heard worse), terrible (horrible, awful, jarring) score, stupid commentary about Bronco Harry or some shit.

Several recent films have tried to revive the western genre.  There's the all black western with Idris Elba in it -- because, of course, the old west was just chock full of black folks.  (You know how I feel about re-writing history and the all of a sudden brand-new claim that a quarter of the west was settled by blacks). There's the 194-year old Clint Eastwood creaking vehicle Cry Macho.  There's the recent Apache Junction - which had some  hillbilly ass country singer in it. It's not not working. The western is dead.  Cowboys are over.

This film lumbers along, stifled by cripplingly bad performances from Crusterlump and Plemon (and frankly this guy hasn't been good in much of anything but Breaking Bad).

Basic story - Breaking Bad Todd becomes infatuated with and marries Mary Jane from Spiderman who has a freaky weirdo son much to the dismay of a badly over-acting Crinkleditch.

They try, but I don't give a tin fuck about Bronco Harvey, every relationship in the film is a caricature, and it's dimly shot which is another problem.

And finally when the warning at the beginning said full nudity -- I truly didn't expect it to be Curdleclink's tiny weiner flopping in the mud.

If I were you I'd saddle up and ride right on past this one.

Edited to add:  Way past the point of no return this one nibbles around in Brokeback range.  Why it waited until 20 minutes left in the film to veer in that direction is a mystery.  Although now that I think about it, I may have completely misread one scene because I didn't exactly grasp what was going on (was thinking Clutterditch had a hard on for his brother's wife, essentially, but maybe not).  Either way..... This overly long film wasn't worth the effort.  BECAUSE it flirted around the homo path I'm willing to bet it gets assloads of unmerited praise from woke reviewers.  It gets none here.  Boring.  Late alleged twist doesn't justify the overly boring slog to get there.
« Last Edit: December 05, 2021, 12:53:12 PM by Kaos »
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GH2001

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #3186 on: December 06, 2021, 01:28:10 PM »
I think we can go on record saying K doesn't like Benedict Cumberbatch.
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Kaos

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #3187 on: December 06, 2021, 02:06:03 PM »
I think we can go on record saying K doesn't like Benedict Cumberbatch.

Wrong.

I liked Blinkerduck Crinkledbitch in the Sherlock series.  Liked that a lot actually. Cumpleflag is also a good choice for Dr. Strange. 

I didn’t care for him much in the gay code breaker movie and he was the worst part of the Whitey movie with Johnny Depp.  Why ask that guy to play a short, heavyset Southie?  Thought he was a really odd and ultimately flaccid choice to play Khan in the Star Trek reboot.  The hell does he know about rich Corinthian leather anyways? 

I’m ambivalent about him generally.  He was just bad in this.  He didn’t even walk right.
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wesfau2

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #3188 on: December 06, 2021, 05:08:02 PM »
Wrong.

I liked Blinkerduck Crinkledbitch in the Sherlock series.  Liked that a lot actually. Cumpleflag is also a good choice for Dr. Strange. 

I didn’t care for him much in the gay code breaker movie and he was the worst part of the Whitey movie with Johnny Depp.  Why ask that guy to play a short, heavyset Southie?  Thought he was a really odd and ultimately flaccid choice to play Khan in the Star Trek reboot.  The hell does he know about rich Corinthian leather anyways? 

I’m ambivalent about him generally.  He was just bad in this.  He didn’t even walk right.

Hell...he ain't even ole timey!
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You can keep a wooden stake in your trunk
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And Imma keep a bottle of that funk
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GH2001

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #3189 on: December 06, 2021, 05:11:05 PM »
Hell...he ain't even ole timey!

I happen to know that this band of miscreants here interfered with a Lynch mob in the performance of its duty!
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Kaos

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #3190 on: January 02, 2022, 10:53:47 AM »
Black Widow
The first time I watched this movie I did so on a plane and the volume didn't work.  I may have reviewed it after, but don't recall if I did. I watched it again over the weekend with the volume on.  It was better that way. 

Marvel has a way of making even the most ridiculous, mundane stories palatable.  Fun even. And this was no exception.  The origin stories for the female characters -- first Captain Marvel and now Black Widow -- don't have the same fire as those of the male characters (think Iron Man for instance, a near perfect superhero movie) but they try. 

Part of it is the choice for actors - Bree and Scarlett are both kind of bland after you get past their surface good looks. Part of it is because the stories are either outlandish or kind of boring.  But both are still good movies (and sadly better than anything DC has offered to date with the lone exception of WonderWoman).

Black Widow sort of jumps into the middle of the Marvel timeline and then fills in the back story by allowing her and her 'sister'  to interact with their long-lost 'parents'.  The sister is played by the gratingly worthless and despicable Florence Pugh who tarnished her watchability for all time with her noxious performance in Midsommar -- i can't stand looking at her.  Mom is Evie from the Mummy franchise (and a lot of other things).  Dad is the new Hellboy and was apparently in Stranger Things.  His blundering faux-Russian attempts at human emotion and his need to be recognized for what he imagined himself to be were some of the best parts of this movie. 

The film's backstory is pretty flimsy and the fight scenes are over-extended, but as with all Marvel movies they figured out a way to mix drama, humor and sentimentality in a nearly perfect combination.

It's not the best Marvel movie, but it's not disappointing. I'd watch it again.
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Kaos

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #3191 on: January 02, 2022, 11:08:29 AM »
The Unforgiveable

Overly long. Overly dour. Overwrought. The Unwatchable. 

A Sandra Bullock vehicle, one I'm sure she hopes will bring her Oscar consideration.  She plays a woman incarcerated for 20 years who wants to reconnect with her baby sister upon release. 

What great acting!  She wears no makeup!  She doesn't wash her hair!  She frowns and pouts through the whole movie!  She looks like the dirty lovechild of Toy Story's Woody and Joan Rivers!  And she brings just as much realism to the role as a dirty string puppet would. 

The few times she breaks out of her dour mope and explodes in some "heartfelt" outburst have zero authenticity.  There's not a single character interaction that has any legitimate emotional resonance.  It's all manufactured and bogus. 

Terrible movie that wastes a lot of moderate talent as it watches her slog drearily through her sad existence. She's supposedly convicted of murder in this movie.  She should be convicted of killing Walking Dead Shane, L&O:CI Detective Goren, Abileen from The Help, and John Boy Walton -- all victims of appearing alongside her in this dull tromp.

Have I mentioned that her surgically butchered pinch face visage is sickening to look at?  I've seen enough of her.  No plans to watch anything she's ever in again.  She's a worthless turd. 
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Kaos

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #3192 on: January 10, 2022, 12:05:54 PM »
Ghostbusters: Afterlife

I despised the "reboot" of the franchise with the doughy, unfunny turd, the leering lesbian and the shrieking black woman. I hated everything about it.  That being the case, I was inclined to appreciate this course correction - one that completely ignores that abomination and veers back into the original lane. 

It wasn't a bad movie. It wasn't a great movie. It was a leisurely nostalgic stroll through all the pieces and parts that made the original Ghostbusters the cinematic icon that it is.  Truth be told, the original Ghostbusters wasn't a great movie either, it was dragged into significance by the performances of Ramis and Murray (see also Stripes) and to a lesser degree Dan, Ernie, Sigourney and Rick.  That and the epic (for the time) special effects carried the film. 

This movie suffers a bit because while the kid characters are pretty good, they don't have the easy, snarky charm of Murray, the deadpan absurdity of Dan, or the nerdy focus of Ramis (although the girl channels that extremely well).  When the orginals show up ready to get back into the fight -- some in an extremely odd way -- it's the same kind of emotional charge us old timers got when Han and Chewie walked into the Falcon. I wish they'd been given more to do, but they did look pretty old and stiff so....

Storyline is pretty simple:  Egon disappears into the spirit world leaving all his possessions (a decrepit house and weird farm) to his daughter and her two nerdy kids.  Financially bereft and facing eviction, they move to his dilapidated digs, the nerdy daughter meets Ant Man, and they discover that all these years good ol' estranged dad/grandpa was obsessed with Gozer and her minions.  His life was dedicated to preventing her return even as almost everyone decided he might be crazy.  But maybe he was right. 

Along the way, the movie folds in almost every facet of the 1984 touchstones -- Ecto1, the traps, Gozer, the dogs, "are you a god", proton packs -- there are so many references it would be impossible to list them all.  That's what keeps this movie afloat.  It will be interesting to see if a planned sequel can hold up on its own without the nostalgic trappings. 

The cast is solid.   The nerd girl kid was completely believable as a Spengler grandchild.  She was the best part of the movie. She and her snarky podcasting sidekick held it all together. The nerd boy I didn't like as much.  The mom (Carrie Coon) I found oddly attractive even though she's really plain. She wasn't bad.

I generally don't care for reboots or re-launches.  This one, though, was done about as well as it could possibly have been.  It was faithful to the original and crafted a story that honored that legacy while opening doors to a future beyond it.  In a lot of ways it felt like a legitimate passing of the torch. 

NOTE:  The one thing I didn't see in the film was Slimer -- which leads me to believe he held out for more money and is waiting on the inevitable sequel. 

With this one in the books, I hope the shit-splattered Chubs McFarty version from 2016 will be burned from existence and never shown again.   
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The Six

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #3193 on: January 10, 2022, 12:48:41 PM »
Ghostbusters: Afterlife
It was faithful to the original and crafted a story that honored that legacy while opening doors to a future beyond it.  In a lot of ways it felt like a legitimate passing of the torch. 

To quote you: Pffffffffffffttttttttttttttt!
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Kaos

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #3194 on: January 10, 2022, 01:05:41 PM »
To quote you: Pffffffffffffttttttttttttttt!

Somebody missed the after credits scenes. 
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