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Kaos' way behind movie reviews

Homer Samford

Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #480 on: March 19, 2011, 01:30:34 PM »
These reviews will not be complete until you give us a review on this...
The Human Centipede

I highly recommend this podcast about it.
http://www.nowplayingpodcast.com/archives/npp031.php
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djsimp

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #481 on: March 19, 2011, 04:32:39 PM »
The Last Three Days

It was just fair.  Wasn't the worst movie I've ever seen, but it dragged for far too long. 

The opening argument was artificial and unnecessary.

It had its moments, but in the end I'd much rather he had just given up on the whole idea and hammered Olivia Wilde.

Damn, your harsh.
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Jumbo

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #482 on: March 19, 2011, 05:29:51 PM »
I highly recommend this podcast about it.
http://www.nowplayingpodcast.com/archives/npp031.php
I loved the Friday the 13th series, those guys are hilarious.
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #483 on: March 19, 2011, 05:34:17 PM »
Damn, your harsh.

Don't let him fool you...he only looks like Ebert.

but in the end I'd much rather he had just given up on the whole idea and hammered Olivia Wilde. 
Can't argue with this though
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Kaos

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #484 on: March 21, 2011, 12:05:59 AM »
My Soul To Take

Wes Craven helmed horror flick. 

Pretty tame and a relatively lame concept.  Dead schizophrenic murderer kills wife and dies on the way to the hospital?  Or does he? 

Will give Wes credit because I wasn't sure who was possessed or if murderer man actually had survived until the denoument. 

Will deduct credit from Wes for playing politically correct culture bingo and making sure he included every stereotype in the book:  Dumb jock, blonde bimbo with a good heart being led astray by the mean girl, the angry goth chick, the nerdy doofus who has a bad home life, the black guy, the handicapped guy (who was also the black guy), the chinese guy, the misunderstood nerd and the religious zealot. 

Wes gets a serious plus for casting Zena Grey's hair.  She wasn't much of an actress but her amazing red mane was a star in its own right. 

Didn't contain the teenaged punch of Wes' Freddy Krueger films, it lacked the mystique of the Serpent and the Rainbow and it wasn't as much campy fun as Scream.

It was just a typical teen horror film that I probably would have enjoyed a lot more if I were still 17 and snuggled up to a girl who was going to jump every time the music crescendoed. 
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djsimp

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #485 on: March 21, 2011, 09:18:33 AM »
K, I was scouring the video rental joint looking for a movie because we've seen almost everything else. I came across a movie that I have been tempted to rent but ended up finding something else that I figured would be better. The movie, Triage starring Colin Farrell and Paz Vega (hot hot hot). Not sure if you've seen it but its a mix of a little action and more drama with a little little splash of romance. I know you will critique a movie more than me but its not a bad movie at all so check it out if you haven't already.
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GH2001

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #486 on: March 21, 2011, 12:56:48 PM »
Anyone seen 'Exam'?

British psychological thriller.

Starts with a simple precept. Turns into a complicated game. Goes all over the place to get to the end with a cliche twist. Not great, but ok. Lot of misdirection and it kept my attention. Decent flick.
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WDE

Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #487 on: March 21, 2011, 01:20:46 PM »
The Machinist

I saw this movie right before I left for Orlando. 

Pretty good movie.  Christian Bale lost 62 pounds for this role, and his disgusting physique really set the tone for the movie. 

It's intense.  That's for sure.
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Kaos

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #488 on: March 23, 2011, 10:37:49 AM »
Stone

Robert DeNiro. Edward Norton. Mills Jojovich (sp).

Basic premise: parole board dude (Bobby) deciding the fate of con (Ed). His wife (Milla) wants her hubby out of the joint and is willing to do anything to help him with the board.

Good setup.  Why this movie had to drift off into brooding spiritual self-analysis and the predictable condemnation of Christians as sanctimonious zealots is a mystery. 

Couple of problems. Didn't buy norton as the con even though he gave a great effort. Cornrows Ed? Really?

Timeline was also an issue.  Allegedly in the slam for torching his grandparents he had supposedly been in a dozen years I think.  That would have made milla's wife character 16 or 17 at the time of incarceration?  She's going to sit around with her itty bitty titties and tootsie roll nips and wait on this guy? 

Bobby D was good as usual but overplayed his breakdown a little bit. 

Pretty good setup but no resolution. All movies don't have to be tidy and sometimes it's okay to leave everybody in a state of tortured misery.  This film seemed to beg for a little more though.  It established a series of emotional interactions and then just left them wrecked.

Not a bad movie. May watch it again with different expectations to see if I missed something. 
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Kaos

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #489 on: March 23, 2011, 10:41:45 PM »
Rango

Johnny Depp is a genius.

The animation was amazing.  It was as good -- no probably better -- than Pixar. 

Story wise and character development wise it beat the pants off Despicable Me (which I liked) and MegaMind (which I thought was crappy).

The movie tipped its hat to just about every spaghetti western ever filmed.   It would almost be worth watching again just to see how many of them it channeled.  Among my favorites was the scene where the undertaker was measuring him for a coffin.

There was also a random KISS reference which made me laugh. 

So many animated movies miss the mark and dwell in crude jokes and/or sappy schmaltz.  This film did neither.  It told an intelligent, engaging story and did it with flair. 

The cast of characters was quite ugly, but the movie found a way to make all the dirty, scuzzy stereotypical spaghetti western dirtbags charming. 

Very good movie. 

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djsimp

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #490 on: March 23, 2011, 11:30:32 PM »
I love Mr. Depp. He is one of my all time favs. Watch the Tourist. My wife doesn't fully like it, but what the fuck does she know, right? Wait, she is a utopia in the bed, but she knows nothing about decent movies. Johnny Depp plays this movie through. Of course, you know who is still Mrs. Sexy. If I had my turn, she would f.o.r.g.et. about Pitt.
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GH2001

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #491 on: March 24, 2011, 09:24:55 AM »
The Machinist

I saw this movie right before I left for Orlando. 

Pretty good movie.  Christian Bale lost 62 pounds for this role, and his disgusting physique really set the tone for the movie. 

It's intense.  That's for sure.

I actually fell asleep watching this one on teh Netflix. It seemed slow moving.


Quote from: Kaos

Rango
There was a random KISS reference which made me laugh. 
Very good movie.

FIXT your review to reflect more accuracy.


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WDE

Kaos

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #492 on: March 24, 2011, 09:46:42 AM »
The Fighter

Rocky for this generation. 

Basic plot: Pedestrian fighter has to overcome his crack addled attention hog brother and his two minutes of fame, his white trash mother, his seven whore sisters and his own self doubt to earn a shot at the title.  It's not exactly an uplifting film, but it does tell a great story of the internal family conflict that almost derailed Micky Ward's path to the top.

Mark Wahlberg played pretty much the same role as he did in Invincible and even Rock Star to a degree as Mick. But it fit him well. 

Christian Bale absolutely deserved the Oscar for his performance as the crack head brother who once knocked Sugar Ray Leonard down, even if Ray actually slipped.  He did a great job of making you hate him while simultaneously feeling sorry for him.

Melissa Leo was pretty good as their trailerpark trashy meddling mother. Loathed her and the seven skanks she spat out.  She also won an Oscar for her role.  I thought she hammed it up way too much. 

If I had been deciding the Oscar would have gone to Amy Adams instead.  She played Mick's girlfriend and the one person who was able to finally disconnect him from his family of albatrosses and get his career moving in the right direction.  Never really been a fan of her work but she was outstanding here. 

The movie was a little long but that's the only real criticism, which is a strange one because I wish it had been a little longer and dealt with Ward's fights against Gatti.

Good movie. 
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Saniflush

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #493 on: March 24, 2011, 09:51:40 AM »
I stopped reading when I saw "seven whore sisters".  I give two thumbs up, sight unseen.
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"Hey my friends are the ones that wanted to eat at that shitty hole in the wall that only served bread and wine.  What kind of brick and mud business model is that.  Stick to the cart if that's all you're going to serve.  Then that dude came in with like 12 other people, and some of them weren't even wearing shoes, and the restaurant sat them right across from us. It was gross, and they were all stinky and dirty.  Then dude starts talking about eating his body and drinking his blood...I almost lost it.  That's the last supper I'll ever have there, and I hope he dies a horrible death."

djsimp

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #494 on: March 24, 2011, 09:55:36 AM »
I stopped reading when I saw "seven whore sisters".  I give two thumbs up, sight unseen.

Its the kind of whores you want to punch in the face.
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Saniflush

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #495 on: March 24, 2011, 09:56:59 AM »
Its the kind of whores you want to punch in the face.

I thought that was all whores?
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"Hey my friends are the ones that wanted to eat at that shitty hole in the wall that only served bread and wine.  What kind of brick and mud business model is that.  Stick to the cart if that's all you're going to serve.  Then that dude came in with like 12 other people, and some of them weren't even wearing shoes, and the restaurant sat them right across from us. It was gross, and they were all stinky and dirty.  Then dude starts talking about eating his body and drinking his blood...I almost lost it.  That's the last supper I'll ever have there, and I hope he dies a horrible death."

Kaos

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #496 on: March 24, 2011, 10:01:02 AM »
I thought that was all whores?

They charge extra for punching. 
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Saniflush

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #497 on: March 24, 2011, 10:12:51 AM »
They charge extra for punching.

Not if they're unconscious.
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"Hey my friends are the ones that wanted to eat at that shitty hole in the wall that only served bread and wine.  What kind of brick and mud business model is that.  Stick to the cart if that's all you're going to serve.  Then that dude came in with like 12 other people, and some of them weren't even wearing shoes, and the restaurant sat them right across from us. It was gross, and they were all stinky and dirty.  Then dude starts talking about eating his body and drinking his blood...I almost lost it.  That's the last supper I'll ever have there, and I hope he dies a horrible death."

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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #498 on: March 24, 2011, 10:18:51 AM »
Not if they're unconscious.
8 more posts and you get a button
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Re: Kaos' way behind movie reviews
« Reply #499 on: March 24, 2011, 10:22:35 AM »
I thought that was all whores?

Well there's the face punching kind and the donkey punching kind.
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You meet a man on the Oregon Trail. He tells you his name is Terry. You laugh and tell him: "That's a girl's name!" Terry shoots you. You have died of dissin' Terry.