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Port Hole

Snaggletiger

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Port Hole
« on: December 01, 2022, 05:05:56 PM »
So Monday is the official first day that players can jump in the Continuum Transfunctioner Thingy to look for another team.  Some players are already declaring their love for all things port hole, including Auburn lineman, Keiondre Jones. 

QB, Brennan Armstrong, a 3 year starter at Virginia, also said he's heading elsewhere.  In 2021, the guy threw for almost 4,500 yards and 31 TD's. Just a small taste of what's about to be on the market.

I think we're all going to be paying close attention to the portal this off season, as there's no doubt we need to go all Lane Kiffin up in that bitch.  I don't know what Feeze's philosophy is on it, but he's got to know we're sucking hind tit talent-wise at a lot of positions, and we need immediate help.

Putcher portal news here when you think it's of interest to Auburn....or not.  Hope there's not a ton of Auburn news about players heading into that thing. But I imagine we'll have our fair share leave.

 
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bottomfeeder

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Re: Port Hole
« Reply #1 on: December 01, 2022, 05:39:57 PM »
So Monday is the official first day that players can jump in the Continuum Transfunctioner Thingy to look for another team.  Some players are already declaring their love for all things port hole, including Auburn lineman, Keiondre Jones. 

QB, Brennan Armstrong, a 3 year starter at Virginia, also said he's heading elsewhere.  In 2021, the guy threw for almost 4,500 yards and 31 TD's. Just a small taste of what's about to be on the market.

I think we're all going to be paying close attention to the portal this off season, as there's no doubt we need to go all Lane Kiffin up in that bitch.  I don't know what Feeze's philosophy is on it, but he's got to know we're sucking hind tit talent-wise at a lot of positions, and we need immediate help.

Putcher portal news here when you think it's of interest to Auburn....or not.  Hope there's not a ton of Auburn news about players heading into that thing. But I imagine we'll have our fair share leave.

I read something on the internets about this very subject and Auburn's new HfbC Hue Freeze. We are losing some seniors too, so we will need replacements effective immediately. I'm not sure what is going on in his mind, but I hope it's more than just $25 hookers.
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jmar

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Re: Port Hole
« Reply #2 on: December 01, 2022, 06:07:40 PM »
I read something on the internets about this very subject and Auburn's new HfbC Hue Freeze. We are losing some seniors too, so we will need replacements effective immediately. I'm not sure what is going on in his mind, but I hope it's more than just $25 hookers.
They raised their minimum to $35 due to the Biden economy.
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Snaggletiger

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Re: Port Hole
« Reply #3 on: December 02, 2022, 12:14:08 PM »
Mississippi State WR, Rara Thomas, entering the port hole. 44 receptions for 626 yards and 7 TD's this year.  He's from Eufaula, an hour down the road from The Planez.
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

Re: Port Hole
« Reply #4 on: December 02, 2022, 01:02:53 PM »
Mississippi State WR, Rara Thomas, entering the port hole. 44 receptions for 626 yards and 7 TD's this year.  He's from Eufaula, an hour down the road from The Planez.

Better production than any of our current guys.  Would be a solid grab.
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Don't rush me, sonny. You rush a miracle man, you get rotten miracles.

Buzz Killington

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Re: Port Hole
« Reply #5 on: December 02, 2022, 01:38:19 PM »
Should be an easy fix for Hue.  Alls we need are a few OL, DL, WR, LB, Edge Rushers, DB and QB.  Easy peasy.
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Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

bottomfeeder

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Re: Port Hole
« Reply #6 on: December 02, 2022, 02:15:15 PM »
Should be an easy fix for Hue.  Alls we need are a few OL, DL, WR, LB, Edge Rushers, DB and QB.  Easy peasy.

You forgot the "long snapper."
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Snaggletiger

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Re: Port Hole
« Reply #7 on: December 02, 2022, 02:29:56 PM »
You forgot the "long snapper."

^^^This guy knows^^^
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Re: Port Hole
« Reply #8 on: December 02, 2022, 03:45:04 PM »
https://247sports.com/Season/2023-Football/TransferPortal/

Not a whole lot of OL prospects in currently that give me warm and fuzzies.  All the local folk talking heads keep boasting about the NIL war chest that Auburn has handy.  I sure as shit hope we know how to use it to get some steam rollers up front.
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CCTAU

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Re: Port Hole
« Reply #9 on: December 02, 2022, 04:25:10 PM »
You forgot the "long snapper."

Didn't you quote some Dallenbach guy earlier this week? You miss Dax don't you?
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Five statements of WISDOM
1. You cannot legislate the poor into prosperity, by legislating the wealth out of prosperity.
2. What one person receives without working for, another person must work for without receiving.
3. The government cannot give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody else.
4. You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it.
5. When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to work because the other half is going to take care of them, and when the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work because somebody else is going to get what they work for, that my dear friends, is the beginning of the end of any nation.

Snaggletiger

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Re: Port Hole
« Reply #10 on: December 02, 2022, 04:27:48 PM »
https://247sports.com/Season/2023-Football/TransferPortal/

Not a whole lot of OL prospects in currently that give me warm and fuzzies.  All the local folk talking heads keep boasting about the NIL war chest that Auburn has handy.  I sure as shit hope we know how to use it to get some steam rollers up front.

From my understanding, players can't officially put their name in until Monday.  That's new port hole entries.  The ones being mentioned above have stated they plan to.  So, if that's the case, hopefully, there will be a fresh batch of jumbo linemen available next week.
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

Re: Port Hole
« Reply #11 on: December 02, 2022, 04:48:57 PM »
From my understanding, players can't officially put their name in until Monday.  That's new port hole entries.  The ones being mentioned above have stated they plan to.  So, if that's the case, hopefully, there will be a fresh batch of jumbo linemen available next week.

Thank you for the clarification and for learning me.  The past 5 years (with exception to the last 4 games) have looked like a full-blown sissy fight from our fellas in the trenches.  Here's to hoping for some big, mean, King Dunlap looking sons of bitches wearing the orange and blue soon.
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Re: Port Hole
« Reply #12 on: December 02, 2022, 07:03:45 PM »
Solidifying a commitment in the Gump today.
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Snaggletiger

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Re: Port Hole
« Reply #13 on: December 06, 2022, 10:11:39 AM »
Speaking of the portal, Coach Prime arrived Sunday in Colorado, met with the team and told them to all jump in it.  Even introduced his son to the team and told them, this is the new quarterback. 

Deion may be able to attract a lot of talent, but I don't believe that shit would fly at Auburn.
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GH2001

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Re: Port Hole
« Reply #14 on: December 06, 2022, 11:16:29 AM »
Speaking of the portal, Coach Prime arrived Sunday in Colorado, met with the team and told them to all jump in it.  Even introduced his son to the team and told them, this is the new quarterback. 

Deion may be able to attract a lot of talent, but I don't believe that shit would fly at Auburn.

It wouldn't fly in MANY places. Most folks don't like Diddy ball. I think its fine for Shadeur to be the QB next season in Colorado - but he needs to earn that spot. It should not be given to him 7-10 months ahead of time. And especially when Diddy is the new coach. I think that's a bad way to start things.
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WDE

Re: Port Hole
« Reply #15 on: December 06, 2022, 01:43:29 PM »
An honest attempt at translating Coach Prime's speech to his new team:

"Hey guys, you suck.  You're a disappointment to the university & your parents.  You all are some raggity-ass, low-level, Great Value branded bunch of shit stains.  I am bringing some Louis Vuitton players to replace you useless pieces of garbage when I force you enter the portal.  I am the greatest mother fucker that ever lived.  By the way, my son gonna be y'alls QB.  Alright, now let's be a team... and I dare you to ask me questions with this camera on you."

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Don't rush me, sonny. You rush a miracle man, you get rotten miracles.

Snaggletiger

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Re: Port Hole
« Reply #16 on: December 06, 2022, 02:39:31 PM »
An honest attempt at translating Coach Prime's speech to his new team:

"Hey guys, you suck.  You're a disappointment to the university & your parents.  You all are some raggity-ass, low-level, Great Value branded bunch of shit stains.  I am bringing some Louis Vuitton players to replace you useless pieces of garbage when I force you enter the portal.  I am the greatest mother fucker that ever lived.  By the way, my son gonna be y'alls QB.  Alright, now let's be a team... and I dare you to ask me questions with this camera on you."

I'd say that's a pretty fair interpretation.
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Buzz Killington

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Re: Port Hole
« Reply #17 on: December 06, 2022, 04:11:51 PM »
An honest attempt at translating Coach Prime's speech to his new team:

"Hey guys, you suck.  You're a disappointment to the university & your parents.  You all are some raggity-ass, low-level, Great Value branded bunch of shit stains.  I am bringing some Louis Vuitton players to replace you useless pieces of garbage when I force you enter the portal.  I am the greatest mother fucker that ever lived.  By the way, my son gonna be y'alls QB.  Alright, now let's be a team... and I dare you to ask me questions with this camera on you."

He says he's in a lot of pain and wants to know if you can help him.
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Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

Snaggletiger

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Re: Port Hole
« Reply #18 on: December 06, 2022, 04:31:27 PM »
He says he's in a lot of pain and wants to know if you can help him.

Pardon me, Stewardess.  I speak Prime.
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

Snaggletiger

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Re: Port Hole
« Reply #19 on: December 06, 2022, 04:37:25 PM »
Current O-linemen in the Hole

Offensive Line
OL Javion Cohen, Alabama to ?
OL John Young, Kentucky to ?
OL Kevin Pyne, Boston College to ?
OL Brey Walker, Oklahoma to ?
OL Isaac Zatechka, Missouri to ?
OL Ben Coleman, California to ?
OL Logan Brown, Wisconsin to Kansas
OL Jordan Davis, South Carolina to ?
OL Ajani Cornelius, Rhode Island to ?
OL Almarion Crim, Houston to ?
C Jake Renfro, Cincinnati to ?
OL Nate Adams, Hawaii to ?
OL Keiondre Jones, Auburn to ?
OL Gavin Campbell, Austin Peay to ?
OL Reed Buys, Mississippi State to ?
OL Jacob Bayer, Lamar to ?
OL Brant Banks, Nebraska to ?
OL Joshua Braun, Florida to ?
OL Drake Metcalf, Stanford to ?
OL Tanner Bowles, Alabama to ?
OL Kyle Hergel, Texas State to ?
OL Cameron Blaylock, Memphis to ?
OL Avery Jones, East Carolina to ?
OL Marques Cox, Northern Illinois to ?
OL Maleek McNeil, Penn State to ?
OL Edgar Amaya, Colorado to ?
OL Chase Rodriguez, ULM to ?
OL Drake Nugent, Stanford to ?
OL Johnathan Bass, Georgia State to ?
OL Phillip Wilder, Southeast Missouri State to ?
OL Luke Smith, Appalachian State to ?
OL Ja'Khi Green, Maryland to ?
OL Ian Fitzgerald, Missouri State to ?
OL Zane Madison, West Texas A&M to ?
OL Jake Hornibrook, Stanford to ?
OL Michael Purcell, Elon to Duke
OL Joe Horn, Umass to ?
OL Edgar Amaya, Colorado to ?
OL P.J. Williams, Texas A&M to ?
OL Myles Hinton, Stanford to ?
OL Casey Roddick, Colorado to ?
OL Trevor Radosevich, Penn to ?
OL Max Longman, Umass to ?
OL Xavier Graham, Umass to ?
OL Damieon George, Alabama to ?
OL Oliver Jervis, Monmouth to ?
OL Daijon Parker, Saginaw Valley State to ?
OL Ben Hoitink, Penn to ?
OL Josh Volk, Iowa to ?
OL Randy Holtz, Indiana to ?
OL Ches Jackson, Colorado State to ?
OL Thomas Grippo, Wake Forest to ?
OL Nick Gargiulo, Yale to ?
OL Baraka Beckett, UCLA to ?
OL Owen Snively, Colorado State to ?
OL Jeremiah Byers, UTEP to ?
OL Gunner Britton, Western Kentucky to ?
OL Scott Elliott, Harvard to ?
OL Campbell Barrington, BYU to ?
OL Tyler Manoa, UCLA to ?
OL Jacob Golden, Boise State to New Mexico State
OL Brian Stevens, Dayton to ?
OL Andrej Karic, Texas to ?
OL Jon Mucciolo, Sacred Heart to ?
OL Alec Bank, Harvard to ?
OL Jaylen Garth, Texas to Houston

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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."