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Queen Be Gone

Snaggletiger

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Queen Be Gone
« on: September 08, 2022, 02:15:24 PM »
In honor of the Queen of England passing today:

When Mother Teresa died, she had been walking around Heaven for a couple of days, when she summoned St. Peter.

"St. Peter, I've been here in Heaven for 48 hours.  I see everybody walking around with a halo.  I don't have a halo. Is there some sort of problem?"

No Mother Teresa.  We ran out a few days ago.  The new ones are on back order.  I'll get it to you as soon as they come in.

Well, see that you do.

A couple of days later, St. Peter delivers the halo to Momma T, and all is well, until she calls on St. Peter again.

Is there a problem Mother Teresa?

There certainly is.  I just saw Princess Di walking around, and St. Peter, she's got the biggest halo I've ever seen.  Now, I don't mean to complain, but you know my record.  I don't have to tell you about my works on earth.  And what did she ever do.  Marry into royalty?  Do a few photo ops?  Why the huge halo, St. Peter?

Calm down, Mother Teresa.  Calm down.  That's not a halo.  That's a steering wheel.
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."

Kaos

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Re: Queen Be Gone
« Reply #1 on: September 08, 2022, 02:18:45 PM »
Long live His Majesty King Charles the Wuss, Last of His Name.

Muslims have taken over England anyway. 



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If you want free cheese, look in a mousetrap.

Buzz Killington

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Re: Queen Be Gone
« Reply #2 on: September 08, 2022, 02:25:47 PM »
Have they arrested Reggie Jackson yet?
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Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

wesfau2

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Re: Queen Be Gone
« Reply #3 on: September 08, 2022, 04:08:56 PM »
Have they arrested Reggie Jackson yet?

Frank Drebin is on it.
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You can keep a wooden stake in your trunk
On the off-chance that the fairy tales ain't bunk
And Imma keep a bottle of that funk
To get motel parking lot, balcony crunk.

Snaggletiger

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Re: Queen Be Gone
« Reply #4 on: September 08, 2022, 05:28:12 PM »
Frank Drebin is on it.

Like a midget at a urinal, I had to stay on my toes.
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chinook

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Re: Queen Be Gone
« Reply #5 on: September 09, 2022, 02:48:36 PM »
RIP Freddie.
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Snaggletiger

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Re: Queen Be Gone
« Reply #6 on: September 09, 2022, 03:07:17 PM »
RIP Freddie.

Thunderbolts and lightning, very, very frightening me.
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My doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating.  I asked him why, and he said, "because I'm trying to examine you."