The Exodus

[Kaos]

He had no input, in that game.

What you guys are actually truly missing is (you think it really matters Eddie?) Meaning Morris ain't gonna be the one to fuck up our shit.  Gus is/will continue to do so. 

Those of us hopeful about Morris are hopeful for one reason and one reason only.  This might be the first time we will actually have an independent Offensive Coordinator. 

Morris might be the only guy (outside of probably Hugh Freeze) that Gus might actually release and let him be OC.  He ain't ever going to let anyone else do it.  I mean come on guys you think Lashlee or Lindsey or Dilly Dilly were actually developing our offense?  bahahahhah  So at least we get to see an independent OC that can focus on his job and maybe develop something.  You guys act like we had other options.  We can go back to Gus as OC (which will probably happen in game 5) it isn't going to matter.  We will be 3-5 losses.  My point is bitching about Morris...who the fuck cares...our problem is and will always be Gus.  I'm just hoping maybe Morris is a helping factor. 

But go complain about Morris because he will be the scapegoat if it doesn't work, and we will still have Gus on the sidelines after he takes back the offense for the 75th time and we still lose 3-5 a year.

/endrant

You’re right that Gus is gonna Gus. And that it likely won’t make any difference. 

My objections are based in Gus being Gus.  We didn’t try to find a great offensive coordinator to maximize the talent we have.  

We CLEARLY have trouble with coaching QBs and WRs.  Everybody can see that. Did we try to emulate what’s worked so well for LSU and search the NFL for young, upwardly mobile talent that can infuse some life in this shitshow offense?  Somebody who can bring new ideas? Somebody who isn’t tied to Gus’ man-titties and might have some fresh concepts? Did we find a running backs coach who can get us back to consistent quality in the ground game?  

FUCK NO.  Gus hired his butt buddy because he felt bad for him getting fired by mean old Arkansas — fired for putting the most god awful SEC product on the field anyone has seen in decades.  

My problem isn’t Morris per se.  Its fucktard Gus and his close-minded decisions.  He’s so fucking insular in staffing he is never going to improve anything.  It infuriates me 

[Snaggletiger]

You’re right that Gus is gonna Gus. And that it likely won’t make any difference.

My objections are based in Gus being Gus.  We didn’t try to find a great offensive coordinator to maximize the talent we have. 

We CLEARLY have trouble with coaching QBs and WRs.  Everybody can see that. Did we try to emulate what’s worked so well for LSU and search the NFL for young, upwardly mobile talent that can infuse some life in this shitshow offense?  Somebody who can bring new ideas? Somebody who isn’t tied to Gus’ man-titties and might have some fresh concepts? Did we find a running backs coach who can get us back to consistent quality in the ground game? 

FUCK NO.  Gus hired his butt buddy because he felt bad for him getting fired by mean old Arkansas — fired for putting the most god awful SEC product on the field anyone has seen in decades. 

My problem isn’t Morris per se.  Its fucktard Gus and his close-minded decisions.  He’s so fucking insular in staffing he is never going to improve anything.  It infuriates me

You guys are saying the same thing. 

I've long since been resigned to the fact that it is what it is with Gus.  I agree with what you're saying 100%, but it's just beating your head against the wall to have any hope that it's going to change.  He doesn't want to change.  He doesn't want new ideas.  And he damn sure isn't going to give up control no matter who he hires.

Gus thinks his offense is the be-all, end-all to college football.  He is unbelievably paranoid and worried that someone might steal his ideas and concepts.  That sounds like a stretch but it's absolutely the truth.  Since I'm so well connected with the personnel and inner workings of the Athletic Department, I just know things. In all seriousness, I was told that pro scouts, who show up to practices and watch film are granted extremely limited access to both for that very reason.  There was even an article that came out a few years ago contrasting the treatment and access given by Saban and Malzahn.  Lord Saybinz treats them like kings and let's them see anything they want.  Gus....almost nada.  At two of the Tigers Unlimited practices I went to at the indoor facility, they banned cell phones.  The man truly thinks people are trying to steal his secrets.

 He's not going to hire anyone to try something different.  He's never going to give up the idea that if everyone does their job, holds their blocks, runs his routes, makes his reads, his offense will work against any defense in any situation.  Letting someone else implement their offense would be admitting that maybe he was wrong.  And that's not in Gus' DNA.    

[Godfather]

We didn’t try to find a great offensive coordinator to maximize the talent we have. 

Never gonna happen while he is our coach. 

This is the best we are going to get, which is why I am trying to be optimistic.  I don't particularly like it, but at least Morris was a good OC at Clemson.

[wesfau2]

He had no input, in that game.

What you guys are actually truly missing is (you think it really matters Eddie?) Meaning Morris ain't gonna be the one to fuck up our shit.  Gus is/will continue to do so. 

Those of us hopeful about Morris are hopeful for one reason and one reason only.  This might be the first time we will actually have an independent Offensive Coordinator. 

Morris might be the only guy (outside of probably Hugh Freeze) that Gus might actually release and let him be OC.  He ain't ever going to let anyone else do it.  I mean come on guys you think Lashlee or Lindsey or Dilly Dilly were actually developing our offense?  bahahahhah  So at least we get to see an independent OC that can focus on his job and maybe develop something.  You guys act like we had other options.  We can go back to Gus as OC (which will probably happen in game 5) it isn't going to matter.  We will be 3-5 losses.  My point is bitching about Morris...who the fuck cares...our problem is and will always be Gus.  I'm just hoping maybe Morris is a helping factor. 

But go complain about Morris because he will be the scapegoat if it doesn't work, and we will still have Gus on the sidelines after he takes back the offense for the 75th time and we still lose 3-5 a year.

/endrant

My issue is that in the unlikely event that Gus gives him some input, Morris is a FUCKING LIABILITY from a coaching standpoint as shown by his most recent 5 years in the game.

[Godfather]

My issue is that in the unlikely event that Gus gives him some input, Morris is a FUCKING LIABILITY from a coaching standpoint as shown by his most recent 5 years in the game.

So like that's just your opinion ...maaaan.

So the last 5 years are all that matter. Again you are too closely tied to the hogs board brother.  I can rattle off name after name of head coaches that failed that were great coordinators and returned to the game as great coordinators.  Gene Chizik, Muschamp, Steele, Sark...the list goes on.  No offense to our Hog Brethren (fuck you guys) but this is not the SWAC Arkansas team, they aren't what they think they are and Bielema destroyed that fucking program, granted Morris obviously didn't help, but you are comparing apples to olive oil.

[Godfather]

BTW I would say the last 2 years, not 5 sufficed to your opinion Morris did succeed at SMU.  He was a hot coaching prospect, hence the reason he got hired at Arkansas to begin with. 

Let's not pretend Arkansas gave him a job because he was a make a wish kid.

[MrAZiffell]

Let's not pretend Arkansas gave him a job because he was a make a wish kid.

He wasn't, his wife was...she got him out of the house for two years.
Enjoy.

[Buzz Killington]

BTW I would say the last 2 years, not 5 sufficed to your opinion Morris did succeed at SMU.  He was a hot coaching prospect, hence the reason he got hired at Arkansas to begin with. 

Let's not pretend Arkansas gave him a job because he was a make a wish kid.

Could have shared a cab with Mr. Deensfrei from the AMCA.

[Godfather]

He wasn't, his wife was...she got him out of the house for two years.
Enjoy.

You want Gus? we give him to you...real cheap.

[Kaos]

You guys are saying the same thing. 

I've long since been resigned to the fact that it is what it is with Gus.  I agree with what you're saying 100%, but it's just beating your head against the wall to have any hope that it's going to change.  He doesn't want to change.  He doesn't want new ideas.  And he damn sure isn't going to give up control no matter who he hires.

Gus thinks his offense is the be-all, end-all to college football.  He is unbelievably paranoid and worried that someone might steal his ideas and concepts.  That sounds like a stretch but it's absolutely the truth.  Since I'm so well connected with the personnel and inner workings of the Athletic Department, I just know things. In all seriousness, I was told that pro scouts, who show up to practices and watch film are granted extremely limited access to both for that very reason.  There was even an article that came out a few years ago contrasting the treatment and access given by Saban and Malzahn.  Lord Saybinz treats them like kings and let's them see anything they want.  Gus....almost nada.  At two of the Tigers Unlimited practices I went to at the indoor facility, they banned cell phones.  The man truly thinks people are trying to steal his secrets.

 He's not going to hire anyone to try something different.  He's never going to give up the idea that if everyone does their job, holds their blocks, runs his routes, makes his reads, his offense will work against any defense in any situation.  Letting someone else implement their offense would be admitting that maybe he was wrong.  And that's not in Gus' DNA.   

Welcome to the Gus Malzahn School of Football Coaching!  When you attend the Malzahn Method Winter Sessions you'll learn:

1) How to dive twice and launch a bomb (aka three and out)
2) How to run cool trick plays like the dipsy doodle bug reverse flip
3) How to forget you have players on the roster for long, long, long stretches of games
4) How to be completely befuddled in analyzing talent
5) How to coach your quarterback to run like a scared rabbit at the first sign of trouble
6) How to limit your receiving routes to two per game
7) How to teach your quarterback to behave like a turtle
8) How to have a completely limp dick at critical moments, particularly fourth and short
9) How to remain stubbornly committed to something that isn't working
10) How to have no plan B, C or D.

BONUS!  Enroll now and learn the special skill of having only one player prepared for the game so that if that player goes down, the entire system collapses like a house of cards.  That session will feature a film study of the 2016 Auburn-Georgia game as well as highlight footage of the 2017 SEC Championship. 

And that's not all!  The first 20 attendees to register will be treated to a special one-day session with Coach Gus Malzahn where he will teach you how to fill your coaching staff with suckups, sycophants and butt-buddies!  That way you'll never have to worry about listening to anyone tell you you're doing it wrong even when you keep getting the same shitty results over and over and over.  And over.

This is a one-time offer.  Registration is limited to the first 100 attendees and closes February 14.

Get on the Gus Bus.  Bumble fuck your way to a sweet BMW.  Spaces are limited.  Enroll now!

[Kaos]

BTW I would say the last 2 years, not 5 sufficed to your opinion Morris did succeed at SMU.  He was a hot coaching prospect, hence the reason he got hired at Arkansas to begin with. 

Let's not pretend Arkansas gave him a job because he was a make a wish kid.

You sure about that? 


Further: 

I don't usually make predictions, but I'm going to make one here.  Malzahn will hire Dustin Fry as OL coach.  Fry has worked with his ass pal Morris for the last eight years.  

This will solidify 100000% the importance of the butt-buddy relationship in hiring.  

Doesn't matter that the Arky OL was worse than Auburn's.  He's going to hire Morris' unemployed pal over any other potential options out there.  

That's my projection.  

[Snaggletiger]

You sure about that? 


Further:

I don't usually make predictions, but I'm going to make one here.  Malzahn will hire Dustin Fry as OL coach.  Fry has worked with his ass pal Morris for the last eight years. 

This will solidify 100000% the importance of the butt-buddy relationship in hiring. 

Doesn't matter that the Arky OL was worse than Auburn's.  He's going to hire Morris' unemployed pal over any other potential options out there. 

That's my projection. 

God help us.

[GH2001]

Malzahn hires new OL Coach

Auburn, AL
December 7, 2020

Auburn head football coach Gus Malzahn moved quickly to fill the gap left on his coaching staff when offensive line coach J.B. Grimes stepped down.

"We're pleased to welcome Hector Ramirez to our staff," Malzahn said.  "We appreciate everything J.B. did for us and we wish him well, but we're excited to bring some new ideas and innovation to the staff. 

"Auburn has a great tradition of producing some fine offensive linemen and we're going to continue that. I believe we can win championships here and we're gonna." 

Ramirez is currently the assistant manager of the Auburn, Alabama Waffle House and one of Malzahn's closest friends in the town. 

"We're going to work hard with Hector to get him up to speed, but I gotta tell you it's going to be great having somebody working with me every day who I'm really familiar with.  I've had a chance to watch Hector work and I'm really comfortable with his ethic and his ability to juggle multiple tasks. 

"We're a running team and victories at Auburn start on the offensive and defensive line.  It's the same at Waffle House.  I've seen Hector handling a couple of hundred drunk college students and keeping that line moving while his staff scrambled like crazy to get all those orders filled.  He was great under pressure.  Just unflappable.  My waffles were always perfect. That ability to multi-task and that attention to detail is what we're looking for. 

"Scattered, covered, smothered, capped, chunked and topped.  That's what our offensive line is going to be with Hector leading them."

Malzahn met Hector about eight years ago and said that he often designs plays at his standard Waffle House table using the salt shaker as QB, butter for the receivers, a balled up straw paper as the running back and jelly packets for the offensive line. 

Over the years, Hector has joined Malzahn and helped him move the jelly around.  Sometimes Hector just needed the jelly for another table, but other times he did help Malzahn generate some ideas.  Legend has it that Hector designed the offensive line set for Malzahn's famous whirlybird plays. 

"That thing's gonna work," Malzahn said of the dipsydoodle bird play.  "We're gonna keep coming back to it until it does. Hector's gonna be a big help with that." 

Ramirez signed a four-year deal worth approximately $450,000 per year, a step up from his current $51,000 salary at WH. 

"It's not that much,"  Malzahn said of the salary.  "My BMW cost more than that."

That date though. 

[Buzz Killington]

"Sometimes Hector just needed the jelly for another table"

Gold, Jerry

[Kaos]

That date though.

It's science, not math. 

[Snaggletiger]

You sure about that? 


Further:

I don't usually make predictions, but I'm going to make one here.  Malzahn will hire Dustin Fry as OL coach.  Fry has worked with his ass pal Morris for the last eight years. 

This will solidify 100000% the importance of the butt-buddy relationship in hiring. 

Doesn't matter that the Arky OL was worse than Auburn's.  He's going to hire Morris' unemployed pal over any other potential options out there. 

That's my projection. 

Just read an article from .  He says to expect that Morris will be very involved in the new OL Corch hire.  Warm fuzzies I does not has.

On another note from that same piece, Nom pointed out how foosballz has changed with this little tidbit.

Thirty years ago, in 1989, when Auburn went 10-2 and shared the SEC championship, it did not get to 30 points against an SEC opponent until a 30-20 win over Alabama. Those Tigers lost to Tennessee 21-14, beat Kentucky 24-12, beat LSU 10-6, beat Mississippi State 14-0, beat Florida 10-7 and beat Georgia 20-3. They lost a nonconference game to Florida State 22-14.
Clearly, points often came hard. It took a long punt return to set up the winning touchdown against LSU. Reggie Slack’s fourth-down touchdown pass to Shayne Wasden in the final seconds took down Florida.
When it was all over, Auburn shared the SEC championship with Tennessee and Alabama. Slack was the All-SEC quarterback. This season, SEC champion LSU averages almost 50 points per game.
Yes, times have changed in those three decades. College football today is a very different game, and it’s not ever going back to what it once was.

[Kaos]

This.  This is why I have turned my back on Gus. Why I want things to change.  Why I get so frustrated with his smug, "I know everything and we're gonna get better" mumblespeak.  This.  

The (LSU) job became open, (former AD Joe) Alleva said, because of Miles’ inability to use the talent he had on campus.

“Think of the players Les Miles squandered and didn’t utilize properly," he said. "Talking to Les was like talking to a wall. The key (in) getting to a championship level is utilizing talented players. It’s that simple.”

This is EXACTLY where we are.  Look at the players Gus Malzahn squandered and squanders and doesn't utilize properly.  Talking to Gus is like talking to a wall.  

Make the change.  Be the change.  

[Snaggletiger]

This.  This is why I have turned my back on Gus. Why I want things to change.  Why I get so frustrated with his smug, "I know everything and we're gonna get better" mumblespeak.  This. 

The (LSU) job became open, (former AD Joe) Alleva said, because of Miles’ inability to use the talent he had on campus.

“Think of the players Les Miles squandered and didn’t utilize properly," he said. "Talking to Les was like talking to a wall. The key (in) getting to a championship level is utilizing talented players. It’s that simple.”

This is EXACTLY where we are.  Look at the players Gus Malzahn squandered and squanders and doesn't utilize properly.  Talking to Gus is like talking to a wall. 

Make the change.  Be the change. 

change.org

[Snaggletiger]

Not big news but former 4* RB, Jerome Ford, entering the continuum transfunctioner at Denny Chimes U.  5'11" 212.  He was down on a crowded depth chart. In the comments to the article I read, I wound up throwing up after the 15th straight, "We didn't need this guy anyway because of how loaded we are at running back".

[Godfather]

Lost DB Coach and really good recruiter Marcus Woodson to Norvell and FSU.  This is probably the biggest loss

Another Auburn assistant is headed to Florida State.

Defensive backs coach Marcus Woodson, who previously worked with FSU head coach Mike Norvell at Memphis prior to joining Gus Malzahn’s staff, has reunited with the Seminoles’ new coach, a source confirmed to AL.com. Woodson’s move was first reported by 247Sports.


Woodson spent each of the last two seasons coaching defensive backs at Auburn after being hired as the Tigers’ 10th assistant coach in January 2018. In 2018 he focused on working with the cornerbacks, but following the departure of Greg Brown, Woodson and Wes McGriff split duties in the secondary, working with both cornerbacks and safeties in tandem.

Woodson also served as Auburn’s recruiting coordinator and was the Tigers’ defensive assistant in the coaching booth this season following defensive coordinator Kevin Steele’s decision to move down to the field on gamedays.

https://www.al.com/auburnfootball/2020/01/auburn-assistant-marcus-woodson-leaving-for-florida-state-per-reports.html