The Parallel Universe Film Guide

[Tiger Wench]

http://www.parallelfilmguide.com/index.php?title=Main_Page

This should be right up the alley of some of you guys...

The Parallel Universe Film Guide is a grand parody of film buffdom and film history. Everything here has specific targets in the "real" world and I hope there is enough to amuse any person who drops by even casually to look. But…the more you know about films, the more you will get all the references in this parallel universe and be able to enjoy matching all the elements in my fictional world with those of the so-called real one with which we are sadly all too familiar.

"Remember the hit 1997 horror film I Know What You Ate for Breakfast, about “big-breasted teens being chased in the rain by a madman who seems to know each of their dietary restrictions”? Or that vintage (if historically dubious) 1948 biopic Babe Ruth Cures Cancer, in which the Bambino also implements the Marshall Plan? No? That’s because these movies exist only on the Parallel Universe Film Guide, an amazingly large, laugh-out-loud-funny database of films that will never be available on Netflix, along with entries for their nonexistent directors and ersatz stars. Created and maintained by Spencer Green, the PUFG reads like a satirical Wikipedia of cinema (with even less accuracy), full of hilarious film titles — Vigilante Justice? Don’t Mind If I Do!; Arbor Day 2: Seeds of Terror — that instantly evoke their intended targets. Dig deeper and you’ll find insanely detailed plot descriptions, making-of trivia, and phony quotes, too.

[Tiger Wench]

This one is hysterical:

http://www.parallelfilmguide.com/index.php?title=Lionel_Largepenis%27_Adventures_in_Pornland_%281997%29

Lionel Largepenis' Adventures in Pornland (1997)
Created and Written by Spencer Green

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Summary
Serio-comic look at the 1970s Los Angeles porn industry and the odyssey of the well-endowed title character who becomes a star with his amazing three-pronged penis which can shoot multi-colored jizz and play simultaneous jazz solos.

Director
Clark William Stebbins

Cast
Tom Olander (Lionel Largepenis)
Bill Manley
Annalisa Corning (Lush Moistmommy part)
Woodrow L. Funk
Zack Painter
Burton M. Duparr
Shel Kendall Richmann

Didja Know?

In the film, the given name of Tom Olander's character is actually Lionel Largepenis. Interestingly, if he followed the pet-plus-street-address-on-which-he-grew-up formula, Lionel Largepenis would have acted under the porn name Giant Dildo Avenue.

Famous Quotes:
(preparing to shoot scene)

Lush Moistmommy part: Don't be nervous. Everything's going to be great.

Lionel Largepenis: Okay. Should I use all three heads?

Lush Moistmommy part: Sure, that'll be fine. Do they all come together or one at a time?

Lionel Moistmommy part: Um--whatever you like. One at a time, two at a time…one, then three…

Lush Moistmommy part: How about one after another, in a row?

Lionel Largepenis: Okay.

Lush Moistmommy part: What colors do you spew?

Lionel Largepenis: Depends on what I ate. Sometimes I can come red, white, and blue.

Lush Moistmommy part: Oh, that's sweet. You can save that for "Bicentennial Blowjob."

Lionel Largepenis: Cool!

Critical Views:
"I spooged a fountain of purple throbbing majesty!" - Engorged Cock Review