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How long?

War Eagle!!!

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How long?
« on: July 18, 2012, 04:34:05 PM »
Before we see warning signs posted next to all escalators saying don't use this if your ass is in a red rascal...

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GH2001

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Re: How long?
« Reply #1 on: July 18, 2012, 04:35:03 PM »
 :rofl:
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WDE

Buzz Killington

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Re: How long?
« Reply #2 on: July 18, 2012, 04:42:43 PM »
What ya got there...4 volt?
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Now I may be an idiot, but there is one thing I am not, sir, and that, sir, is an idiot.

Tiger Wench

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Re: How long?
« Reply #3 on: July 18, 2012, 05:09:08 PM »
What's even worse is that she WALKS AWAY after - she didn't even need the damn thing...
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CCTAU

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Re: How long?
« Reply #4 on: July 19, 2012, 10:14:00 AM »
Elevator to the left.....

After she was half way up, they should have just let it keep going.At least then when they picked her up, she would be at the top.

My favorite part was when the steps kept hitting her in the face. They should have left her there for a few minutes.
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Five statements of WISDOM
1. You cannot legislate the poor into prosperity, by legislating the wealth out of prosperity.
2. What one person receives without working for, another person must work for without receiving.
3. The government cannot give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody else.
4. You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it.
5. When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to work because the other half is going to take care of them, and when the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work because somebody else is going to get what they work for, that my dear friends, is the beginning of the end of any nation.

Saniflush

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Re: How long?
« Reply #5 on: July 19, 2012, 10:28:12 AM »
Listen, not a year goes by, not a year, that I don't hear about some escalator accident involving some bastard kid which could have easily been avoided had some parent - I don't care which one - but some parent conditioned him to fear and respect that escalator.
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"Hey my friends are the ones that wanted to eat at that shitty hole in the wall that only served bread and wine.  What kind of brick and mud business model is that.  Stick to the cart if that's all you're going to serve.  Then that dude came in with like 12 other people, and some of them weren't even wearing shoes, and the restaurant sat them right across from us. It was gross, and they were all stinky and dirty.  Then dude starts talking about eating his body and drinking his blood...I almost lost it.  That's the last supper I'll ever have there, and I hope he dies a horrible death."

Re: How long?
« Reply #6 on: July 19, 2012, 10:50:24 AM »
Listen, not a year goes by, not a year, that I don't hear about some escalator accident involving some bastard kid which could have easily been avoided had some parent - I don't care which one - but some parent conditioned him to fear and respect that escalator.

My mother told me the escalator could suck children inside of it and that there was no way to get them out.  She also said that it could grab children by the tip of their shoelace. 
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The Guy That Knows Nothing of Hyperbole

Tiger Wench

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Re: How long?
« Reply #7 on: July 19, 2012, 10:52:45 AM »
My mother told me the escalator could suck children inside of it and that there was no way to get them out.  She also said that it could grab children by the tip of their shoelace.

Heard the same exact thing from mine...  and I have my two absolutely paranoid as hell about escalators.  S holds my hand with a Death Grip.
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wesfau2

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Re: How long?
« Reply #8 on: July 19, 2012, 11:13:44 AM »
Listen, not a year goes by, not a year, that I don't hear about some escalator accident involving some bastard kid which could have easily been avoided had some parent - I don't care which one - but some parent conditioned him to fear and respect that escalator.

And the kid is STILL on the escalator!
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You can keep a wooden stake in your trunk
On the off-chance that the fairy tales ain't bunk
And Imma keep a bottle of that funk
To get motel parking lot, balcony crunk.

Godfather

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Re: How long?
« Reply #9 on: July 19, 2012, 11:38:26 AM »
Listen, not a year goes by, not a year, that I don't hear about some escalator accident involving some bastard kid which could have easily been avoided had some parent - I don't care which one - but some parent conditioned him to fear and respect that escalator.

Why don't they ever bring back or remake good shows, like 'BJ and the Bear.' Now there's a concept I can't get enough of, a man and his monkey.
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Re: How long?
« Reply #10 on: July 19, 2012, 12:16:59 PM »
Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned for Sega.
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Godfather

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Re: How long?
« Reply #11 on: July 19, 2012, 12:34:44 PM »
Hey, I love tits as much as the next guy, but why should I pay some old hag good money for some supernatural chicanery coupled with a pair of sagging wrinkled weathered boobs?
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Saniflush

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Re: How long?
« Reply #12 on: July 19, 2012, 12:57:25 PM »
 Hey, I tried to teach you how to handle comics in the sixth grade, but oh no. You wanted to play little league instead.
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"Hey my friends are the ones that wanted to eat at that shitty hole in the wall that only served bread and wine.  What kind of brick and mud business model is that.  Stick to the cart if that's all you're going to serve.  Then that dude came in with like 12 other people, and some of them weren't even wearing shoes, and the restaurant sat them right across from us. It was gross, and they were all stinky and dirty.  Then dude starts talking about eating his body and drinking his blood...I almost lost it.  That's the last supper I'll ever have there, and I hope he dies a horrible death."

Godfather

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Re: How long?
« Reply #13 on: July 19, 2012, 01:38:21 PM »
I'll never forget it. How many times do you get to see Smokey fuck the Bandit?
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Saniflush

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Re: How long?
« Reply #14 on: July 19, 2012, 01:41:43 PM »
Didn't I look just like Burt Reynolds?
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"Hey my friends are the ones that wanted to eat at that shitty hole in the wall that only served bread and wine.  What kind of brick and mud business model is that.  Stick to the cart if that's all you're going to serve.  Then that dude came in with like 12 other people, and some of them weren't even wearing shoes, and the restaurant sat them right across from us. It was gross, and they were all stinky and dirty.  Then dude starts talking about eating his body and drinking his blood...I almost lost it.  That's the last supper I'll ever have there, and I hope he dies a horrible death."

dallaswareagle

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Re: How long?
« Reply #15 on: July 19, 2012, 01:57:57 PM »
What would have been funny at about the 1:35 mark somebody hit the start button again, massive ass busting. Cripple (or those pretending to be) and non-cripple alike.
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A veteran is someone who, at one point in his life, wrote a blank check made payable to 'The United States of America ' for an amount of 'up to and including my life.' That is Honor, and there are way too many people in this country who no longer understand it.'