TigersX Fantasy Football League

[AWK]

I started out really well.  Now, my team has decided not to play.  Fuck.

[Tiger Six]

I will enjoy looking down on all you peons this week from my first place perch.  I am still amazed at those of you who apparently don't know what  a "bye" week is and how some players won't play due to injury.  Amazed, mind you, not pissed..I hope you continue to do it against me.

Feel good story of week 6:  the Sadr City Rockets beat the piss out of Death Dealers 109-58 despite the fact that the Sadr City Rockets had two players on their bye week.  Now that's skill right there, folks.

I lost interest a long time ago. 

I figure I can beat Mark and stay out of the cellar.

[Thrilla]

I lost interest a long time ago. 

I figure I can beat Mark and stay out of the cellar.

Hey, as long as you keep winning games and get in the top 8 you will have a shot at the playoffs and the championship.  It's still anybody's game IMO.  For example, my main points hog Romo is a pussy and broke his pinkie finger.  Now he's out and I picked up the Tom Brady wannabe in his place.  The world can be cruel sometimes.

[chinook]

The world can be cruel sometimes.

just ask ogre.  he got 2nd place in fantasy baseball. 

[chinook]

I lost interest a long time ago. 

I figure I can beat Mark and stay out of the cellar.

or you can strive for the consolation championship.  thrilla did in baseball and look at him. 

[Ogre]

just ask ogre.  he got 2nd place in fantasy baseball. 

Fuck you. 

[AWK]

65 - 64...unbelievable.

[AWK]

Who has the highest score this week?

[Thrilla]

Who has the highest score this week?

You lawyers and your rhetorical questions.

[Thrilla]

Suck it, bitches.  I don't need Tony Romo's pussy ass to secure first place.

I look down upon you and laugh...first place hasn't felt this good since...well...since I beat ya'lls ass in the college bowl pick 'em.

Next on the agenda:  Ogre and the Cock Blockers.  Blood will spill, and it'll taste of wine.

MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

[Ogre]

Suck it, bitches.  I don't need Tony Romo's pussy ass to secure first place.

I look down upon you and laugh...first place hasn't felt this good since...well...since I beat ya'lls ass in the college bowl pick 'em.

Next on the agenda:  Ogre and the Cock Blockers.  Blood will spill, and it'll taste of wine.

MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

I've been looking forward to this day since the Muffdivers last played (and beat) 2 Balls 1 Bat in Fantasy Baseball. 

First, I'm gonna fuck you up real good.  Then I'll punt your newborn into the Chattahoochie while you watch through blood-stained eyes.  Finally, I'll make my way back to your house and tease your wife with a game of 'just the tip', then spit in her face and manually steal all of her breastmilk.  I'll mix it with EverClear and drink it all the way back to Birmingham.

Don't fuck with me.

[Thrilla]

I've been looking forward to this day since the Muffdivers last played (and beat) 2 Balls 1 Bat in Fantasy Baseball. 

First, I'm gonna fuck you up real good.  Then I'll punt your newborn into the Chattahoochie while you watch through blood-stained eyes.  Finally, I'll make my way back to your house and tease your wife with a game of 'just the tip', then spit in her face and manually steal all of her breastmilk.  I'll mix it with EverClear and drink it all the way back to Birmingham.

Don't fuck with me.

Oh yeah?  Well before you can even do that, I'm going to catch a flight to Birmingham ASAP.  I'll break into your house, catch you by surprise, and use your favorite bottle of scotch to break over your head and knock you the fuck out so I can tie you up in a chair.  I'm then going to hog tie your wife when she gets home and undress her.  I'll bang her brains out in front of you (because you'll be awake by then) and simultaneously pluck each pube out of her puss before she makes your ears bleed with a mind-shuddering, screaming orgasm.  Then, before I bust a nut, I'll pull out and spooge all over your face.  I'll use this adhesive to then arrange a nice goatee on your face with your wife's pubes, which you'll wear into this weekend's matchup to remind you of who owns who.

Mother Fucker.

[Ogre]

Oh yeah?  Well before you can even do that, I'm going to catch a flight to Birmingham ASAP.  I'll break into your house, catch you by surprise, and use your favorite bottle of scotch to break over your head and knock you the fuck out so I can tie you up in a chair.  I'm then going to hog tie your wife when she gets home and undress her.  I'll bang her brains out in front of you (because you'll be awake by then) and simultaneously pluck each pube out of her puss before she makes your ears bleed with a mind-shuddering, screaming orgasm.  Then, before I bust a nut, I'll pull out and spooge all over your face.  I'll use this adhesive to then arrange a nice goatee on your face with your wife's pubes, which you'll wear into this weekend's matchup to remind you of who owns who.

Mother Fucker.

That's all well and good, but there is a snag in your plan...she doesn't have any pubes for you to pluck.

BOO-YAH!

Seeing how you want to get nasty, let me fill you in on something else I have in store for you:

I'm going to hire a Private Investigator to follow you on your way home from work and take a picture of you smoking your one-hitter.  He'll email it to me, and I'll go up to Kinko's to print out 100 fliers with said picture printed on them.  The following morning, I'm going to stand out in front of your office, handing the fliers to all the parents who trust you with their children. 

Assuming you'll be fired by lunch, I will be hiding underneath your Altima.  Once you approach your drivers-side door, I'm going to cut through your $49.99 wingtips with my hunting knife, slicing your achilles tendon and making you fall to the ground.  Then I'm going to frog you in the temple, making your right eyeball pop out of it's socket.  Since you'll be writhing in pain and unable to stand, I'll proceed to take a shit in your empty eye socket, and pop your eyeball back in. 

For the rest of your days, you'll be known as Shit For Brains.  Literally.

[AWK]

I was just going to fart in your cereal...but Jesus.

[Thrilla]

That's all well and good, but there is a snag in your plan...she doesn't have any pubes for you to pluck.

BOO-YAH!

Seeing how you want to get nasty, let me fill you in on something else I have in store for you:

I'm going to hire a Private Investigator to follow you on your way home from work and take a picture of you smoking your one-hitter.  He'll email it to me, and I'll go up to Kinko's to print out 100 fliers with said picture printed on them.  The following morning, I'm going to stand out in front of your office, handing the fliers to all the parents who trust you with their children. 

Assuming you'll be fired by lunch, I will be hiding underneath your Altima.  Once you approach your drivers-side door, I'm going to cut through your $49.99 wingtips with my hunting knife, slicing your achilles tendon and making you fall to the ground.  Then I'm going to frog you in the temple, making your right eyeball pop out of it's socket.  Since you'll be writhing in pain and unable to stand, I'll proceed to take a shit in your empty eye socket, and pop your eyeball back in. 

For the rest of your days, you'll be known as Shit For Brains.  Literally.

Even I'm man enough to know when I've been pwned.  I blame your wife's bald eagle.

By the way, can you send me the proportions you use when mixing breast milk and Everclear?  I've been meaning to spice up my White Russian recipe.

I'm going to go get blazed now before I mold the minds of today's youth.

[Come Honor Face]

i think i'm last

[ssgaufan]

i think i'm last

You started out good, but then your team went to hell in a handbasket.  I've actually been wondering if you were still playing.  I guess you just suck at it huh? 

I know, this was one of those pot calling the kettle black moments.

[Come Honor Face]

You started out good, but then your team went to hell in a handbasket.  I've actually been wondering if you were still playing.  I guess you just suck at it huh? 

I know, this was one of those pot calling the kettle black moments.

yes, Owens sucks
yes, Bush is having surgery
yes, Matt Jones is getting suspended soon
yes, Kellen Winslow sucked
yes, Darren McFadden isn't getting the carries

I suck bad.

[AWK]

Fantasy football for me is about as bad as Auburn's season.

[Thrilla]

That's all well and good, but there is a snag in your plan...she doesn't have any pubes for you to pluck.

BOO-YAH!

Seeing how you want to get nasty, let me fill you in on something else I have in store for you:

I'm going to hire a Private Investigator to follow you on your way home from work and take a picture of you smoking your one-hitter.  He'll email it to me, and I'll go up to Kinko's to print out 100 fliers with said picture printed on them.  The following morning, I'm going to stand out in front of your office, handing the fliers to all the parents who trust you with their children. 

Assuming you'll be fired by lunch, I will be hiding underneath your Altima.  Once you approach your drivers-side door, I'm going to cut through your $49.99 wingtips with my hunting knife, slicing your achilles tendon and making you fall to the ground.  Then I'm going to frog you in the temple, making your right eyeball pop out of it's socket.  Since you'll be writhing in pain and unable to stand, I'll proceed to take a shit in your empty eye socket, and pop your eyeball back in. 

For the rest of your days, you'll be known as Shit For Brains.  Literally.

BITCH YOU DO NOT RIDE WITH ME,
BITCH YOU RIDE A MARTA BUS!

The poon doesn't even need our star running back to play in tonight's MNF game...we beat the Cock Blockers without him!  Thank you, Kurt Warner.

Despite all the trash talk and attempts at ruining my life, Ogre still got  .  I took this picture as he shed his first tear over the loss:



That's how we roll, bitches.  Next week, Wesfau learns what real pain is supposed to feel like.