Who lives next to the craziest neighbor?

[GarMan]

I didn't know you lived in GarMan's neighborhood. 

I keep to myself and only acknowledge the existence/presence of others as I see fit.  It's just better that way.  Aside from the .50 cal in the dining room, I'm likely the weird one in my neighborhood.  Most of the folks let their vermin run around the neighborhood and play wherever without any respect for anyone else's property.  A lot of them also let their dogs schit wherever they want.  I'm the guy with the stinky cigar...  side arm...  bad attitude...  and chainsaw...

In the past, I was more neighborly with folks, but I became the tool shed for the dirtbag mooches.  If someone needed something, they'd just borrow it from me and keep it for 3-4 months.  I put a stop to that when one of 'em bastards moved away without returning some of my tools.  Today, they can all suck it!

[Snaggletiger]

Don't know about crazy, but our neighbors across the street are just plain weird.  They shut themselves up tighter than Dick's hat band.  The lady rarely comes out of the house and she's about 5' tall and 5' around.  Looks like the Poltergeist lady.  As soon as they moved in, everything in the yard, including two huge old oak trees started dying.  Is it a coincidence that their address is 1313 Mockingbird Lane? 

[AUTiger1]

I don't have any that are crazy per say, but I have some that fight like 5 year olds.   Our neighborhood is pretty legit, we (men) sit around grill, drink, smoke, spit and cuss while the women all sit around, gossip and tell us how "awful and mean" we are.    Even those who don't participate do a lot of "front porch sitting", which is a lost art imo.

[GH2001]

I lived by a blonde Muslim who had a child by a man who claimed to be her father and also claimed the son to be his.  She wandered around in various stages of odd dress (when she ventured outside the house) and spoke with a weird accent.  The son lived with her and I never saw daddy/grandaddy/hubby around.

She dyed her hair jet black at one point and then cut it short. 

There were always weird lights at night.  Looked like red lasers behind the blinds.

Six months ago she just disappeared.  House vacant.  Word is pappy/gramps/lover shipped her to Syria.  No clue what happened to the boy. 

The guy next to that has a .50 cal in his dining room.  He's convinced the Obama uprising is coming and he's gonna be ready.

Ehhh, thats not a Muslim. Just a Bammer.

[AWK]

I don't have any that are crazy per say, but I have some that fight like 5 year olds.   Our neighborhood is pretty legit, we (men) sit around grill, drink, smoke, spit and cuss while the women all sit around, gossip and tell us how "awful and mean" we are.    Even those who don't participate do a lot of "front porch sitting", which is a lost art imo.

It's good to see you are taking back the term...

[AUTiger1]

It's good to see you are taking back the term...

Oh, no no, it's cool, I'm taking it back.

[AUJarhead]

They're not gay! They're hobbits!

[Saniflush]

Right after the Sam/Frodo suckfest, right before the credits roll, Sam fucking flat out bricks in Frodo's mouth.