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Rules

Tarheel

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Rules
« on: October 03, 2007, 04:55:59 PM »
Thought you military folk might appreciate this:

Marine Corps Rules:
1.  Be courteous to everyone, friendly to no one.
2.  Decide to be aggressive enough, quickly enough.
3.  Have a plan.
4.  Have a back-up plan, because the first one probably won’t work.
5.  Be polite. Be professional. But, have a plan to kill everyone you meet.
6.  Do not attend a gunfight with a handgun whose caliber does not start with a ‘4.’
7.  Anything worth shooting is worth shooting twice. Ammo is cheap. Life is expensive.
8.  Move away from your attacker. Distance is your friend. (Lateral & diagonal preferred.)
9.  Use cover or concealment as much as possible.
10. Flank your adversary when possible. Protect your flank.
11. Always cheat; always win. The only unfair fight is the one you lose.
12. In ten years nobody will remember the details of caliber, stance, or tactics. They will only remember who lived.
13. If you are not shooting, you should be communicating your intention to shoot.

Special Forces Rules:
1.  Look very cool in sunglasses.
2.  Kill every living thing within view.
3.  Adjust your speedo.
4.  Check hair in mirror.

Army Rangers Rules:
1.  Walk in 50 miles wearing a 75 pound rucksack, while starving.
2.  Locate individuals requiring killing.
3.  Request permission via radio from Higher-ups, to perform the killing.
4.  Curse bitterly when mission is aborted.
5.  Walk out 50 miles wearing a 75 pound rucksack while starving.

US Army Rules:
1.  Curse bitterly when receiving operational order.
2.  Make sure there is extra ammo and extra coffee.
3.  Curse bitterly.
4.  Curse bitterly some more.
5.  Do not listen to 2nd LTs; it can get you killed.
6.  Curse bitterly.

Air Force Rules:
1.  Have a cocktail.
2.  Adjust temperature on air-conditioner.
3.  See what’s on HBO.
4.  Ask ‘What is a gunfight?’
5.  Request more funding from Congress, with a ‘killer’ Power Point presentation.
6.  Wine & dine ‘key’ Congressmen, invite DOD & defense industry executives.
7.  Receive funding, set up new command and assemble assets.
8.  Declare the assets ‘strategic’ and never deploy them operationally.
9.  Hurry to make 13:45 tee time.
10. Make sure the base is as far as possible from the conflict but close enough to have a tax exemption.

Navy Rules:
1.  Go to Sea.
2.  Drink Coffee.
3.  Deploy Marines
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The question isn't who is going to let me; it's who is going to stop me. 
-Ayn Rand

The problem with socialism is that eventually you run out of other people's money.
-The Right Honourable Margaret Thatcher

The government solution to a problem is usually as bad as the problem.
-Milton Friedman

The nine most terrifying words in the English language are: 'I'm from the government and I'm here to help.'
-Ronald Reagan

When the people fear their government, there is tyranny; when the government fears the people, there is liberty.
-Thomas Jefferson

D-Day

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Re: Rules
« Reply #1 on: October 03, 2007, 05:19:27 PM »
Goddamn, that's good fuckin' shit right there!!

Rule #7 for the Army: There is no such thing as "NCO business." Your business IS my business.
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Pell City Tiger

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Re: Rules
« Reply #2 on: October 03, 2007, 05:43:13 PM »
Quit butting in on your sergeants business. Let them do their job. The last thing they need is an officer coming in and fucking everything up in the enlisted world.
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"I stood up, unzipped my pants, lowered my shorts and placed my bare ass on the window. That's the last thing I wanted those people to see of me."

D-Day

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Re: Rules
« Reply #3 on: October 03, 2007, 06:09:42 PM »
Quit butting in on your sergeants business. Let them do their job. The last thing they need is an officer coming in and fucking everything up in the enlisted world.

We really need a smiley on this thing that casts a simple fishing line and reels in a whale...

C'mon, Glenn. You know me better than that. But I won't walk by a defeciency just for the sake of "NCO business." That's where I draw the line. If we ever meet remind me to tell you about my little run in with the sergeant major of a sister squadron and the regimental squadron major back in April. I'd like to get your opinion of the whole matter.  ;)
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Pell City Tiger

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Re: Rules
« Reply #4 on: October 04, 2007, 12:00:27 PM »
I was fucking with you, man. C'mon, hug it up!
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"I stood up, unzipped my pants, lowered my shorts and placed my bare ass on the window. That's the last thing I wanted those people to see of me."

GarMan

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Re: Rules
« Reply #5 on: October 05, 2007, 11:21:57 AM »
Hey Sammy,

Here are a couple of avatar ideas for you...

[attachment deleted by admin]
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My rule of life prescribed as an absolutely sacred rite smoking cigars and also the drinking of alcohol before, after and if need be during all meals and in the intervals between them.  - Winston Churchill

Eating and sleeping are the only activities that should be allowed to interrupt a man's enjoyment of his cigar.  - Mark Twain

Nothing says "Obey Me" like a bloody head on a fence post!  - Stewie Griffin

"Every government interference in the economy consists of giving an unearned benefit, extorted by force, to some men at the expense of others."  - Ayn Rand

Tarheel

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Re: Rules
« Reply #6 on: October 05, 2007, 03:48:01 PM »
Hey Sammy,

Here are a couple of avatar ideas for you...

Great ideas Garman, matzeltof!  I will consider using them after I finish horse-whipping my mixed race child and listening to the cantor read from the Talmud this evening. 
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The question isn't who is going to let me; it's who is going to stop me. 
-Ayn Rand

The problem with socialism is that eventually you run out of other people's money.
-The Right Honourable Margaret Thatcher

The government solution to a problem is usually as bad as the problem.
-Milton Friedman

The nine most terrifying words in the English language are: 'I'm from the government and I'm here to help.'
-Ronald Reagan

When the people fear their government, there is tyranny; when the government fears the people, there is liberty.
-Thomas Jefferson